Samantha

It seems that as each new year strolls by I become more and more interested and absorbed by the musical culture around me. I have gone from listening to country and classic rock on the radio, Dolly Parton eight-track tapes, Michael Jackson vinyl records, U2 cassette tapes, and endless CDs of artists like REM, Gillian Welch, Tom Waits, Bob Dylan... Now I listen more locally to musicians who perform live concerts at bars and in homes, more intimate instances of songwriting joy and performance sincerity. I love the house concert concept and this is now where I learn first about new songwriters from singers I know and appreciate already.

Here are two videos I recorded and edited of Samantha Crain at a house concert. She is accompanied by Daniel Foulks who is an exceptional fiddler and a pleasure to listen to how he complimented Samantha's well-loved songs. The second video includes clips from the 2010 winter solstice lunar eclipse and Christmas lit-trees along Western Avenue in Oklahoma City. Enjoy!





Samantha Crain with Daniel Foulks performs "Devils in Boston" and "Songs in the Night" at a Blue Moon House Concert on December 17, 2010, in Oklahoma City. Video recorded and edited by Laura Anne Heller of Blue Athena Productions.
Visit Blue Moon House Concerts on the web:
http://bluemoonhouseconcerts.moonfruit.com
Visit Samantha Crain on the web:
http://www.samanthacrain.com

Lauren Z

I'm not a big fan of slam poetry -- It's just not my style -- but I can appreciate the work of someone who stirs sincere emotion and speaks about real issues and real people. Lauren Zuniga is one of these phenomenal slam poets I love to listen to at live performances. Recently she performed at a house concert two poems which I recorded and have posted here by way of YouTube. Enjoy. Become her fan. Let her rock your world.





Lauren Zuniga performs her poems "To the Oklahoma Progressives Plotting Mass Exodus" and "Things to Do in an Ice Storm" on December 17, 2010, at a Blue Moon House Concert. Video recorded and edited by Laura Anne Heller of Blue Athena Productions.
Visit Blue Moon House Concerts on the web:
http://bluemoonhouseconcerts.moonfruit.com
Visit Lauren Zuniga on the web:
http://www.laurenzuniga.com

Athena's Arthouse

People may or may not know that I opened my own little shop on Etsy.com, Athena's Arthouse.  I have been crafting designs inspired by my surroundings, long drives through the countryside, memories, and ideas from novels and poetry.  I am using fabric cut from old t-shirts, jeans, pants, skirts, dresses, blouses, sheets, pillowcases, etc... Anything that can't seem to serve it's intended purpose and can be recycled into a new piece of art.  Some clothing I have bought from places like Goodwill or thrift shops when I noticed most of the fabric was fine except for an unsightly stain somewhere, which is why it hadn't been bought yet.  No problem, I can cut that away and use the rest of the shirt or skirt for several fiber art pieces.  I also am recycling wooden plaques that once proudly displayed brass plate awards.  I have over a hundred of these things and I am working to create each one into proud display of one of my fabric collages.

I'm new to this Etsy shop selling and to sewing in general. I am hopeful that people will like my little artworks.  Here's a link to the store:

five

Really?  Five years?  Have I really paced back-and-forth down this road for five years? I broke the path but found my way back easily and quickly. I thought I diverted myself for eternity, but I knew I would kick this gray gravel again. I nurture the irises and tulips along the way, pluck a daisy or black-eyed-susan. I watch the sun beam through leaves and think of you.  The change of seasons do not alter the world enough to hide this path I've walked.  You'll appear somewhere along the way, I'm sure, or at least that's what I've always told myself at the great southern red oak halfway down this road I've traveled. Will I remember if ever the wind and rain pelt the bark until my little carved letter whittles away?

Five years.  Is this a surprise or an acknowledgment?

Blue Moon House Concerts videos

Stories, Tales, Secrets...

I made three mixed CDs for a friend and named them "Stories", "Tales", and "Secrets."  Here's the list of songs and artists I chose to share.  Many of these singer-songwriters I have met and heard in person, some because they live and work in Oklahoma City, while others have traveled here for a gig at a venue or a house concert.  I also wanted to share the recent artistic creations I have been working on, so I gave each CD a cover, and I'll have that same image accompany the playlists below...

"Song I Gave to the Sparrow"

Stories
1. "For the Morning" - Camille Harp
2. "Babylon" - Justin Witte One Man Band
3. "We Are the Same" - Samantha Crain
4. "Salem" - Penny Hill
5. "Everybody Knows" - Kelly B. Band
6. "Cheyanna" - Mike Beck & The Bohemian Saints
7. "Land & Sea" - Rebecca Loebe
8. "Little Birdie" - Michael Huff
9. "The Dam Song" - Samantha Crain
10. "Goodbye Blues" - Easton Stagger Phillips
11. "Don't Hurt My Heart" - Mike Beck & The Bohemian Saints
12. "South" - Camille Harp
13. "California" - Rebecca Loebe
14. "Untitled #3" - Ali Harter
15. "Rising Sun" - Samantha Crain
16. "Be Kind to You" - Forest Sun
17. "All the Pretty Girls Leave Town" - Tim Easton
18. "It's Okay to Be Alone" - Elam Blackman
19. "Keep on Going" - Michael Huff
20. "The Weeping Willow" - Devon Sproule

"Nest"

Tales
1. "This Too Shall Pass" - Danny Schmidt
2. "Dancer" - Jared Tyler
3. "Blackwing Butterfly" - Noelle Hampton
4. "Soul Parade" - Jesse DeNatale
5. "Better Nobody" - Kelly B. Band
6. "Siren" - Rebecca Loebe
7. "Song for John" - Penny Hill
8. "She Run Away" - Mike Beck & the Bohemian Saints
9. "I Would" - Ali Harter
10. "Fortune Teller" - Michael Huff
11. "Scissor Tales" - Samantha Crain
12. "Your Chances Are High" - Camille Harp
13. "Angel on the Floor" - Elam Blackman
14. "Lonely Spires" - Rachel Ries
15. "Working My Angels Overtime" - Justin Witte One Man Band
16. "Life of a Buckaroo" - Mike Beck & the Bohemian Saints
17. "The Wind" - Penny Hill
18. "Band of Angels" - Kelly B. Band
19. "Too Far Off" - Michael Huff
20. "Collapsible Plans (Sugar)" - Tom Freund

"Black Crow"

Secrets 
1. "The River" - Samantha Crain
2. "Flowering Spade" - Sean Hayes
3. "When I Go" - Brett Dennen
4. "Spaces In Between" - Shane Alexander
5. "Happy Ending" - Matt the Electrician
6. "Blues Man" - Michael Huff
7. "Forms of the Truth" - Beth Waters
8. "Strangers" - Kris Delmhorst
9. "Ragdoll" - Gavin Glass & the Holy Shakers
10. "Tribute to Taj Mahal: Cakewalk Into Town" - Justin Witte One Man Band
11. "Santa Fe" - Samantha Crain
12. "Houston" - The Bittersweets
13. "Southern Smile" - Four Year Bender
14. "Meridian" - Rebecca Loebe
15. "Other Hearts" - Michael Huff
16. "Reflecting Light" - Sam Phillips*

I included "Reflecting Light" just because I was completely absorbed in the song while working on these and I thought it appropriate to close with it.

Song I Gave to the Sparrow: poem illustrated

So I finally finished this one today.  I didn't get around to doing much else, though. At least I went to Red Cup and paid up on the kayak.  I had a delicious Frito pie with mixed greens added to it. Yum.  Talked about art for a while, and talked about ashes and memory, too.  But I finally finished this illustration. The camera doesn't capture the subtle pattern in the fabric used for the tree's leaves.  I used three old shirts for this (the tree leaves, the blue background, and black figure).  The tree trunk is felt, so I had to stitch that down instead of using fabric bond and an iron.  It would've melted.  The fabric used for the hills came from fabric scraps I bought at a store. The bird in a nest I had used in one of the Chakra collages. I dismantled them this summer. Oh, the music is from sheet music I found in an antique store and the wooden plaque is recycled from plaques that were once used but headed for the dumpster.

The poem, "Song I Gave to the Sparrow", can be found in the Oklahoma Writing Edition of Sugar Mule.

Illustration: Song I Gave to the Sparrow

I'm working on the second fabric collage to illustrate "Song I Gave to the Sparrow". This one will have some other objects in it, like the paper music and the bird's nest, maybe...

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Black Crow: poem illustrated

Here it is, finished! I debated on beads, buttons, and ribbons but I think keeping it simple is best. The colors aren't showing very well.  That's a full moon in silver satin.  The little bird is blue. There is some mesh netting coming from the man's mouth across the frame... That's how I guessed smoke could be portrayed...
The poem, "Black Crow", is published in the online version of Sugar Mule in the Oklahoma Writing Edition.   A print edition is due to hit the press sometime in November and will be available in December.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Illustration: Black Crow

I am working on some fabric art ideas that illustrate individual poems from my collection, Rise When the Rooster Crows. This one is for "Black Crow". Work in progress.



- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Kayak love

I went kayaking out at Lake Overholser recently. Here's a few pics from the adventure. :)



And then I loved the scene around Overholser - so full of trees and birds and quiet without big city buildings in view.



And then I bought my own kayak from a local musician friend - I love it's story! Here it is on top of my car just after I bought it.



- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

open windows

I want to fall in love one day.  To feel loved and to experience the feeling of loving someone.

I have loved someone from a distance now and I have allowed myself to cage those feelings, only to speak of them once face-to-face and to write of them once in a late-night email, with a response that was tenderly written. Yet, a great canyon of silence has grown between us since then.  I have searched for a bridge to cross over, but any that existed I fear he might have burned.  Why?  I don't fit some vision, or he is afraid of hurting me, someone he cares about, or I am too honest for his tender and scuffed up heart.  I have no answers that truthfully tell that story.  Only he could explain.  And he isn't going to, and I am not going to ask. I have waited.  I've not pursued anyone because I knew that I was not ready, what with all my searching and hoping. But I've finally packed my car and driven away from the canyon. It echoes the car's wheels rolling on gravel, dust rising, and no one there to say goodbye.  Farewell, friend.

And so the tide has come around, the wind is blowing across the lake, my paddle skims the water, and I see the reeds swaying with a late summer hope of what is possible, what is to come, what autumn might bring.

The screen door bangs with the coming autumn wind.  Wildflowers lean toward the rising sun and sway as it travels to sunset. I've opened the windows.  I want to fall in love again. 

spoken

I know I speak when no words spill from my mouth,
but if you would kindly please do me a favor:
Pay no attention to my silent utterances;
They speak what I cannot allow to be said.
I cannot recall what secrets I shared mutely,
what was said in a ring twist or waist-poised hands
or any other linguistic phrase of movement
that spoke in hand-covered whispers.
I will go out on a lake or into the woods
and be quiet in the wind or hidden by leaves.
Be still. Unspoken. Be quiet. Wordless.

baby photo album covers

A few of my co-workers commissioned me to create something creative for these clam-shell binders that we filled with archival photo sheet protectors.  We turned them into photo albums where the new mothers can print and store photos of their newborns. 

The first was having a baby boy, but I didn't know what colors she was using in decorating the baby's room, but the baby boy blue still worked out just fine.  This was my first try, but I think it looks pretty good.  I used two old shirts (the two striped pieces) and three swatches of new fabric in the design.  It needed some more interest so I added the ribbon and buttons.  I used HeatnBond Ultrahold fabric adhesive to adhere the fabrics to each other.  Then I used a low-temp glue gun to wrap the fabric around a matte board I pre-cut to place on the binder's cover.  I did not want to puncture the binder itself because that would weaken the cover and open holes for pests and dust. It was dull looking with just the fabric, so I decided to stitch down some ribbon and buttons for interest.  I probably could have done this prior to gluing it to the board, but I also think that stitching through the board secures the buttons and thread more.   I then glued the finished cover to the front of the clam-shell binder, and voila!  Baby Boy Blue Cover for a photo album.

The second one was for a co-worker having her first baby girl.  The new momma-to-be is all about pink and bling, so I knew that it needed to have a little more glitz than the Baby Boy Blue.  I used to have a pretty pink button-down shirt that had some clear sequins stitched in the front, so I cut two swatches of this fabric, including the gem snap-buttons.  I used this for the top and bottom sections of the design.  The middle swatch of fabric comes from a pink knit shirt I found in Goodwill years ago.  I dug around in my beads and found a few that seemed to match and add some bling to the overall feel of the cover.  The beads on the ribbon in the middle section can slide up and down a little on the iridescent ribbon.  The beads and ribbon at the bottom half hide a rough edge in the pink plaid, and it was stitched down in-between each bead section.  I am not a big fan of pink, but this one turned out quite well, I think!  Hello, Baby Girl Pink Cover.

breaker-switch

It has been a long time to feel
the electrical current flow,
strike through this stagnant blood
and spark fire in a kiss or touch:
arms enclose, shoulders hug,
silent love murmurs red.

Daydreams of inappropriate 
matches, smolder in my guarded
words, hide-and-hide moments,
wait for a match to ignite and
burn the dreamed love letters,
stolen evening wishes.

---
Over-worked emotional babble. :P

bird

"Be as a bird perched on a frail branch that she feels bending beneath her, still she sings away all the same, knowing she has wings." - Victor Hugo (1802-1885; French Romantic Poet, Novelist, and Dramatist)

"Faith is the bird that feels the light and sings when the dawn is still dark." - Rabindranath Tagore (1861-1941; Indian Poet, Playwright, and Essayist; Won the Nobel Prize for Literature in 1913)

"I once had a sparrow alight upon my shoulder for a moment, while I was hoeing in a village garden, and I felt that I was more distinguished by that circumstance that I should have been by any epaulet I could have worn." - Henry David Thoreau (1817-1862; American Essayist, Poet, and Philosopher)

"I wanted to know the name of every stone and flower and insect and bird and beast. I wanted to know where it got its color, where it got its life - but there was no one to tell me." - George Washington Carver (1864-1943; American horticulturist, Chemist, and Educator)

secret treasures

I forgot I have a few things I am not supposed to have.  I kept them for decorative purposes, but now I don't know where I'd put them in this house?!

Fourth

I have no plans today for the Fourth of July.  I don't believe I am even going to go anywhere to celebrate.  If I were still in Mississippi or Kentucky there'd be gatherings I couldn't avoid being part of because that is what family and friends are for - cookouts, potlucks, living room jams, front porch ramblings.  But I've not yet found that niche here in Oklahoma.  I may go to Lake Hefner around sunset and see what's happening there and take pictures.  Probably will be a good many sailboats out.  I wish there were fireworks somewhere near the lake; The reflections on the water surface would be spectacular.

Just a little while ago a friend posted this infographic for Gumbo.  It made me crave Louisiana cooking, and New Orleans culture especially.  I have never made Gumbo before, but my mother has made it from time to time.  Just like red beans and rice recipes, whenever I asked her for the one she references her response is nearly always, oh, I just do it.  She knows it by heart and knows the art of cooking so well that if she doesn't have what is required she knows how to substitute ingredients so that it is still an marvelous and adventurous meal.  I'd like to learn that intuitive art of cooking.

Birds in the kitchen

I have also added a few more flying birds to my kitchen... Here's a few bird-watching moments:

The birds-on-a-wire idea along the top of the backdoor and window frame.  There's my little coffee maker corner.  I still need a curtain for that window but I haven't found the right one yet.

I felt the gaps between some of the pots and pans hanging on the wall needed a little color and flight.  Nice, huh?  I need to add a few more pots and pans, too, anyway.  :)

Oh, I finished the flowers since this picture was taken.  I also added some flying birds to the upper cabinets.  I still want to add some "grass" below the flowers and creeping animals on the lower cabinets, but this is a good enough peek.  I have been considering replacing the kitchen rugs with solid green ones, but it doesn't really matter. This picture was taken in March when it was still really cold outside and I had a draft-stopper rolled up in front of the back door. I'd love to have the light fixture in the kitchen replaced.

Birds in the dining room

Last night I cut out more flying and perched bird silhouettes to put on the walls in the dining room.  I saw on several blogs these picture frame walls and I wanted to mimic the idea, but I also wanted to tie the room in with other adjacent rooms... The best, easiest, and most fun way was to incorporate these birds.  So below I have included some photos from my dining room in progress.  I have not yet filled the frames with the pictures I intend to use... Some frames have photographs from a recent exhibit.  I will fill all the frames with some of my own favorite photography, though in sepia-tone.  I plan to accomplish this by August 1st!

still

Good God.

I still do.

laundry

I don't have a washer & drier at home, so I go to the laundry mat. I don't really care for the hot place, but there's one treat. The one thing I love about laundry mats are the little 1-3 year olds running around the mother or father (or both! like tonight). It never fails that when one is crying, bawling, & looking around, the little one sees me, makes eye contact, and I make a funny smile. Instantly, quiet. No more baby crying. The little one has my attention. I don't have to go over to it and make hand gestures, nor do I talk to them. Sometimes the parents notice and thinks it cute, nod, smile at the child, probably thankful that the baby is quiet. All I do afterwards is look their way from time to time, smile, wink, wave, and the baby starts smiling, making funny faces, waving back. :)

It always puts the cherry on top of my ice cream sundae.

Sailing Sunset

This video uses photos taken nearly every ten seconds of a sunset on Lake Hefner while sailboats criss-cross the frame. I like this one better than my first attempt. :)

Time lapse photography by Laura Anne Heller at Lake Hefner, Oklahoma City, Oklahoma, on June 9, 2010. Music, titled "Corncob", from incompetech.com.

Lakeside

This is my first time lapse photography video. I stood for about 2 hours snapping pictures nearly every ten seconds of sunset on Lake Hefner and kite surfers in Oklahoma City, Oklahoma, on June 8, 2010. I'll post the second one, of sailboats, in a few minutes.

Photography and video by Laura Anne Heller. Music from freeplaymusic.com ("From Little Rock to Glasgow" and "One Horse Town").

flow

Go with the flow.

growth

Day Lily reminds me that growth begins from within.

memorial weekend festivals

What a weekend! Saturday I worked at the Chuck Wagon Gathering & Children's Cowboy Festival for a few hours but still managed to snap quite a few pictures.  I also stopped by there on Sunday for the food and more picture-taking.  Here's a few I like best:










On Saturday, Sunday, and Monday I spent time down at the Paseo Art Festival taking pictures of the live music, enjoying the art, drinking lots of water, walking until my feet became sore, and hoping that I didn't get sunburned.  I took a total of 845 pictures at the festival, but not all of those are worth uploading online or even keeping on a CD. I'll post a few of the pictures over the week with their respective band links.

vivid dream

I had such a vivid and emotional dream last night that I woke with both a feeling of sadness and dread for someone.  I don't remember all the details, such as what town I was in and why.  I know I was somewhere I wasn't usually at, and neither was my friend, M.  I was with some other friends going to bars to listen to live music and I was taking pictures of the bands.  At some point we were in a large building and in this building was a police station. I was able to look into the police station and see who was being arrested and booked for overnight stays, etc.  I saw my friend, M, being escorted into the station.  He was noticeably drunk, a cynical drunk.  He wasn't trying to strike out at anyone, but he was belligerent and vocal.  In real life I have never seen him this way and I don't know if he'd get this way if he did get drunk.  But in any case, in the dream he was being escorted into the station.  they sat him down in a seat along the wall and as he looked around himself, he looked out the windows of the station and saw me.  His whole countenance fell.  His eyes turned downcast. I not only could feel his embarrassment and shame in the dream, but I woke with it.  I woke right about this point, feeling both very sad, and feeling as though someone I knew was full of disappointment, shame, and embarrassment. 

I've only woke with this heavy-laden feelings once before after having a dream in which I knew that my boyfriend at the time was going to break up with me very soon. In the dream we all were at his brother's wedding, but I was sitting at a table alone. I looked around and made eye contact with my boyfriend. His expression of sadness and pity rippled through me and in the dream I realized I shouldn't be there, that he and I had broken up, and suddenly I felt embarrassed and wanted to flee.  I woke with a very heavy feeling on my chest.  That was on a Thursday, and on Saturday we broke up.

I wonder how real dreams are sometimes.  Maybe the situation has not and will not happen, but the strong emotions in the dream may be connected to the other person more than we ever thought possible.  I wanted to call M this morning to see if he is all right.  I'll probably call him Saturday afternoon.

confession

I confess
I love you in a multitude of ways.
The wind turns a leaf over in the sidewalk.
Just as I pass sunlight illuminates its face.
I watch the sunset knowing at dusk
you're walking towards where it set.
You turn back as the moon rises
and take up a pen to write lines.
I wonder if I should confess
there are dreams not meant to come true.
And I confess I know
that I cannot love you in all ways
anymore.

Ramona

I've been researching Ramona, the novel by Helen Hunt Jackson. I found the original 1910 silent film produced by D.W. Griffith for American Biograph on YouTube.



I have to find a 1936 copy of Ramona so I can watch it in its entirety and then compare it to the novel. I already suspect that most of the racial conflict will have been omitted in favor of increasing drama/romance that Helen Hunt Jackson included only because she thought it would attract more readers: reel them in with the romantic story and inform them of the injustice that took place in Southern California, thus winning sympathy and rallying support for Native American land rights acts in Congress. Instead, tourism eventually became the enterprise... I still have to find the film, though. In one of the collections at work we have a ton of lobby cards from the 1936 production of Ramona which I can use to illustrate for the exhibit.

dream a highway back to you

There's some people I miss and love with a highway heart.   This song in some ways sums my feelings, but it is the refrain that evidences that I keep circling back to face the feelings I always carry.

I think the guy who made this video shortened the song by cutting out some choruses, but that's okay.  I kept them in place in the lyrics posted after the video.   Take a little Gillian Welch with your meandering mountain drive.



I Dream A Highway - Gillian Welch

Oh I dream a highway back to you love
A winding ribbon with a band of gold
A silver vision come and rest my soul
I dream a highway back to you

John he's kicking out the footlights
The Grand Ole Opry's got a brand new band
Lord, let me die with a hammer in my hand
I dream a highway back to you.

I think I'll move down into Memphis
And thank the hatchet man who forked my tongue
I lie and wait until the wagons come
And dream a highway back to you.

The getaway kicking up cinders
An empty wagon full of rattling bones
Moon in the mirror on a three-hour jones,
I dream a highway back to you.

Oh I dream a highway back to you, love
A winding ribbon with a band of gold
A silver vison come arrest my soul
I dream a highway back to you.

Which lover are you, Jack of Diamonds?
Now you be Emmylou and I'll be Gram
I send a letter, don't know who I am
I dream a highway back to you.

I'm an indisguisable shade of twilight
Any second now I'm gonna turn myself on
In the blue display of the cool cathode ray
I dream a highway back to you.

I wish you knew me, Jack of Diamonds
Fire-riding, wheeling when I lead em up
Drank whisky with my water, sugar in my tea
My sails in rags with the staggers and the jags
I dream a highway back to you.

Oh I dream a highway back to you, love
A winding ribbon with a band of gold
A silver vision come molest my soul
I dream a highway back to you.

Now give me some of what you're having
I'll take you as a viper into my head
A knife into my bed, arsenic when I'm fed
I dream a highway back to you.

Hang overhead from all directions
Radiation from the porcelain light
Blind and blistered by the morning white
I dream a highway back to you.

Sunday morning at the diner
Hollywood trembles on the verge of tears
I watched the waitress for a thousand years
Saw a wheel within a wheel, heard a call within a call
I dreamed a highway back to you.

Oh I dream a highway back to you, love
A winding ribbon with a band of gold
A silver vision come molest my soul
I dream a highway back to you.

Step into the light, poor Lazarus
Don't lie alone behind the window shade
Let me see the mark death made
I dream a highway back to you.
I dream a highway back to you.

What will sustain us through the winter?
Where did last year's lessons go?
Walk me out into the rain and snow
I dream a highway back to you.

Oh I dream a highway back to you, love
A winding ribbon with a band of gold
A silver vision come and bless my soul
I dream a highway back to you
I dream a highway back to you

Oh I dream a highway back to you, love
A winding ribbon with a band of gold
A silver vision come and bless my soul
I dream a highway back to you.

feeling good

So... which version do you like best?

Nina Simone - Feeling Good



Michael Bublé - Feeling Good



Muse - Feeling Good



George Michael - Feeling Good





I prefer Nina Simone's recording.

april poetry ponderings

April 8, 2010

"If I had a single flower for every time I think about you, I could walk forever in my garden."

- Claudia Ghandi

April 7, 2010

"This spring as it comes bursts up in bonfires green,
Wild puffing of emerald trees, and flame-filled bushes,
Thorn-blossom lifting in wreaths of smoke between
Where the wood fumes up, and the flickering, watery rushes."

- D.H. Lawrence, "The Enkindled Spring"

April 5, 2010
"It was late, late in the evening,
The lovers they were gone;
The clocks had ceased their chiming,
And the deep river ran on."

- W. H. Auden, "As I Walked Out One Evening"

April 4, 2010
"I want to mirror your image to its fullest perfection,
never be blind or too old
to uphold your weighty wavering reflection.
I want to unfold."

- by Rainer Maria Rilke (Translated by Annemarie S. Kidder), "I Am Much Too Alone in This World, Yet Not Alone"

April 3, 2010

"I love you as the plant that never blooms
but carries in itself the light of hidden flowers;
thanks to your love a certain solid fragrance,
risen from the earth, lives darkly in my body."

- Pablo Neruda, "Sonnet XVII"

national poetry month

Last April, for National Poetry Month, I excerpted a line or two from a poem I like and linked to it in my facebook profile. Last year it was a hit, and so I will do it again this year, including my posts here as well. Click the link to read the entire poem. Enjoy!

April 1, 2010

"I do not know which to prefer,
The beauty of inflections
Or the beauty of innuendoes,
The blackbird whistling
Or just after."

- Wallace Stevens, "Thirteen Ways of Looking at a Blackbird"

April 2, 2010

"Do not move
Let the wind speak
that is paradise."

- Ezra Pound, "Notes for Canto CXX"

house concert

I went to my first house concert of the year down at a friend's in Oklahoma City.  A lovely house with open doors, beautiful art, an inviting backyard, and an intimate setting to sit and listen to some good music sung right there to you and fellow music lovers.  Last night's concert was Brine Webb and Samantha Crain.

I'd heard Samantha play at the Conservatory just a week ago for Ali Harter's CD Release Party.  I hadn't heard Brine Webb before, and I sure was glad to get a peek at some of his songs last night!  His style has a little melancholy lilt that meanders through a meadow, a forest path, a city street at dusk.  I managed to get there in time to hear about 5 or 6 of his songs, including a lullaby.  I became entranced at his finger-picking style for "The Ghost Family" song, one had said he's written a long time ago.  Check out an interview with him by Sophie Zine and don't miss this video and this video, both from his song "Cigarette Tree."

Brine Webb, House Concert, OKC, OK, March 26, 2010

Samantha Crain played some of her well-known tunes and also some new songs, opening up her last set with "Lions" and closing with "Scissor Tales."  She has an openness to the audience, joking about brown and pink-red koozies and how they were ordered with a real customer service rep named Gregg.  Her song lyrics are full of emotion and no matter how many times she has sung the song, it still sounds poignant with fresh feelings and stories.  I think of sunny days with big fluffy clouds drifting along and midnight walks under constellations and meteor showers when I hear Sam's songs.  Check out some videos on youtube.

Samantha Crain, House Concert, OKC, OK, March 26, 2010

Having seen Samantha with a backing band and now flying solo for a small audience, I'm appreciative of the house concert venue.  I missed the first hour because I got lost (as usual) in downtown Oklahoma City looking for the main mail sorting post office to drop off some bills; By the way, that post office doesn't have a mail drop after hours.  So I was finally relieved to get to the Feuerborn house for the concert of the night.  Such a warm setting, potluck, a little wine and beer, and of course, plenty of other people who appreciate good music.  What a wonderful way to spend a Friday evening.

winter or spring

Today is the first day of spring, or so we thought.  During the night a winter storm came through with a few inches of snow, some slushy rain, and a lot of gusty wind.  I'm tired of winter and ready to plant some seeds in the four huge planters in my front yard and probably some spinach in my backyard.  But it was a beautiful sight to see the white reflection of snow through the windows behind my daisies in wine bottle vases.

I realized I was out of coffee, so I had to walk to the nearest store and purchase some so I wouldn't have one of those painful headaches I tend to get when lacking caffeine.  On the way there and back the big-breasted robins were hopping quickly from snow-covered parking spot to sidewalk and back again.  I managed to get a picture of one.

Here's to hoping that this is winter's last hurrah this season.  May spring arrive in its full glory and thrust of seedlings, birdsong, and bloom.  And spring breaking ground makes me think of a quote I cannot find, one that says something about the violence of spring, but this one by Whitman will do:

"The violets in the mountains have broken the rocks." - Tennessee Williams

red dirt music

Last night's Concert at the Cowboy was a pretty good success and I managed to get quite a few snappy photos of Brandon Jackson while he performed under the End of the Trail sculpture.  I also recorded one of his songs, so take a peek at this Red Dirt musician from Stillwater, Oklahoma.  By the way, he is recording an album in May, so be on the lookout for one hot off the press this Summer.

my nephew's birthday

Happy birthday to you! 

Happy birthday to you!

Happy birthday dear Ryland!

Happy birthday to you!

I'm a silly aunt and haven't mailed your birthday present yet!  I hope that you're feeling better and had some cookies for your birthday!  So you're nine years old!  Did you know that in China the number nine is a lucky number?  The Emperor's robes would often have nine dragons on it because nine meant that he would rule the empire for a long time and the dragons meant that he would have a lot of power, strength, and good luck as Emperor.  :)  So you will have a very long and lucky ninth year, I'm sure!

Happy Birthday, Ryland, and I am sending you get well wishes and lots of love!  

Love, 

Your Aunt Laura

spontaneous music

I ran around town a little bit last night after work. Edgar Cruz was playing at the National Cowboy & Western Heritage Museum as part of their Concert at the Cowboy music series. I'd never heard him before. I wasn't disappointed. I had intended to stay for an hour, but I stayed two hours instead. Talented musician, and he had such great charisma with the audience. I've seen and heard a harp guitar before, but many people had not heard of it before and were all awed by his talent on that lovely instrument. He also played a C.F. Martin guitar, which I adore their sound. I tried taking a few pictures without my flash because I don't like paparazzi-ing musicians with my non-stop photography. Here's one of my favorites, plus a few more in my Flickr album.

Afterwards, I headed down to Coffy's Cafe in the Plaza District to hear my friend Justin Witte play for a little while.  Once I got down 16th, I heard some music that sounded very familiar and it wasn't coming from the coffee shop.  It was outside No Regrets Tattoo; A couple of guys on guitar and fiddle, Tom VandenAvond and Seabass were playing a Leonard Cohen song, and then soon after played "Wagon Wheel."  So I stuck around for a few songs and a few more pictures.

I finally made it over to Coffy's Cafe and got a little mocha, two peanut butter cookies, and a little Justin Witte music for the evening.  My camera began to not cooperate, so this is the only decent photo that I shot that I like, though I fooled around with it in a picture editor; Originally the flash tried to wash him out.  So hearing his song "Babylon" (listen to it on his MySpace music page) wrapped up my evening and I went home.  It is Saturday morning and I am going to drive out to one of the city's hiking trails and explore.  Pictures later.

the arrow and the song

Photo of Southern Red Oak was taken in August 2008, Berea, Kentucky. It is the one with the lightning scar down its trunk. I came across the poem tonight. It is appropriate.

Thank you, Longfellow.

movies of my heart

Last night I posted a link to a music video by The Swell Season on facebook, which promptly turned into a discussion of movies a friend would probably like to see.  I realized that there are some similarities of emotion in some of my favorite films, a kind of drama that is honest and real, based on real complications and problems, not silly scenarios.   So here's a list of some of my favorite films, and maybe some of the songs that continually make me fall in love with the musician or movie or story or life!  I'll try to list them in order I have discovered them, if I can remember!

Sidenote: I have links to Wikipedia articles, IMDB pages, and Amazon or iTunes soundtracks solely for informational purposes. Wikipedia is by far not the end-all, be-all authority on accurate information, but it is a quick and easy enough starting place. Reference the external links and citations at the end of their articles.

Orlando
Orlando is based on the book of the same name by Virginia Woolf.  I had already read the book, the only one I have yet read by Woolf.  I liked the odd story of a person over centuries of time. It is a kind of fantasy, but Woolf was likely trying to show there's a history to each person who connects them centuries back and that there are also people we meet whom we instantly know we know.  A kind of intuition, kindred spirit, connection unexplained between two people that should just be trusted, be it that they are lovers or lifelong friends of like-mindedness and curiosities. I know I watched this sometime when I was in community college, 1995-1997, and likewise read the book only months before.  I am sure it was summer. Here I have a link to the trailer for the film:



More info: Wikipedia article for novel. Wikipedia article for film.  IMDB for film info and trailers.

The Secret of Roan Inish
I think I stumbled across this movie while I was at the University of Mississippi, probably in 1997 or 1998. I quickly bought the soundtrack for it and played it whenever I had essays to write for my Irish Literature class.  I recall sitting at a picnic table in The Grove listening to it while writing those first essays.  I played that CD all the time!  The story is both sad and mythical.

"[The plot] is centered on the Irish and Orcadian folklores of selkies—seals that can shed their skins to become human. The story, set on the west coast of Ireland, is about Fiona, a young girl who is sent to live with her grandparents near the island of Roan Inish, where the selkies are rumored to reside. It is an old family legend that her younger brother was swept away in his infancy and raised by a selkie. Part of the film takes place in Donegal."

The soundtrack's song "Fiona's Lullaby" had such an impact on me that I wrote a poem incorporating the Gaelic lullaby and its English translation into it.  This video  plays "Fiona's Lullaby" first and the lyrics, in Gaelic and English, are located to the right "more info" section.  "Piper's Lullaby" is second and instrumental.



More info: Wikipedia article for film. IMDB for film info and trailers. Info for soundtrack. Listen to or purchase soundtrack on Amazon or iTunes.

Love Song for Bobby Long
I could go on forever about this movie.  One, I love New Orleans and it is the central landscape and culture of the film.  Two, the dialogue interests me because there's plenty of literary references to Moliere, Dickens, Twain, Auden, etc.  That tugs at my literature heart.  There's a character whom you both love and are confused by because of his mistakes and how he has complicated his life by them.  You want to smack him while at the same time just sit on the porch enjoying a glass of whiskey or bourbon and talk about literature, society, the city.

This movie also includes the Carson McCullers novel The Heart is a Lonely Hunter, a paperback book that Purselane reads while waiting to get on the train but upon finishing it, changes her mind and stays in New Orleans.  I finally read The Heart is a Lonely Hunter last summer, and it was a very good read.

Also, the movie's screenplay is based on the Ronald Everett Capps novel Off Magazine Street.  I should read it someday.

The soundtrack features several songs written and performed by Grayson Capps, plus a few old traditional songs like "Barbara Allen" being performed by John Travolta while sitting outside with friends for a cookout.  By the way, there are many versions of "The Ballad of Barbara Allen."   A Myspace music profile was created by someone to feature several songs most loved from the film; Give it a listen.  Or enjoy this video of Grayson Capps still performing his song "A Love Song for Bobby Long":



More info: Wikipedia article for film. IMDB for film info and trailers. Info for soundtrack. Listen to or purchase soundtrack on Amazon .

Frida
Let me count the ways in which I love Frida.  Colorful, passionate, artistic, humorous, humbling, honest, full of conflict, history, and music.  The acting demonstrates both the strength of the actors and actresses, and definitely the strength of those they portray.  The human relationships, her strong will, her trust, his conflict with himself and with desiring to meet the common ground they share, but also failing. Her forgiveness and resilience. The story moves forward at a pace one can feel comfortable with, and it covers some historical moments and movements in Mexico. It demonstrates the cultural differences in the art worlds between Mexico City and New York City. The motivations that drive artists, expression and statement standing in the face of politicos and funders.  Finding the honest venue for one's art.

I know I watched it while I was living in Hattiesburg, MS, working at a used bookstore, and attending my last graduate level classes in Library & Information Science at the University of Southern Mississippi.  So this was probably September 2003. I also know that when I finished watching it I hit play again. Yes, I watched it twice in one evening I loved it so much.

Love the soundtrack, but one of the songs that always made me grin was Salma Hayek singing "La Bruja" in this bar scene.  The translation of the lyrics are probably not that accurate, or just don't translate culturally very well into English.



More info: Wikipedia article for film. Wikipedia article for the artist Frida Kahlo. IMDB for film info and trailers. Wikipedia info for soundtrack. Listen to or purchase soundtrack on Amazon.

The Hours
I know I was working at a central Mississippi private school in 2002 when I saw The Hours one weekend.  And I saw it three times in the movie theatre that weekend because I loved it so much.  I've never done that before with any other movie. I already knew I loved something about Virginia Woolf, though I had only read one of her books and some of her letters.  The idea of showing the author writing the book, another woman's life being impacted by the book, and then later a woman being the epitome of the character, I loved it.  This is how literature spreads itself across people's lives. The score was somber, and it didn't leave a desire to listen to it without the film, but it definitely tugs at your emotions while watching the film whether you notice it or not.

This scene is one of the strongest ones depicting the struggles Virginia faced, continually, as herself and as a writer. And she asks so much patience from her husband, Leonard, and he makes sacrifices often to keep some kind of happiness and peace for her and their marriage. And one of my favorite quotes comes from this scene: "You cannot find peace by avoiding life, Leonard."



Once
I've only seen the film once, and I was in Kentucky at the time.  I had only moved to Berea about 4 or 5 months earlier and was settling into my first house and first real 8-5 job. I moved to a small town where I knew no one but those whom I worked with and the students on campus.  Thankfully everyone I met were warm people and creative individuals.  It wasn't long before I met some great writerly people I still love and know.  But when I first moved there I watched a lot of movies and read a lot.  I tried working on my writing and never felt good enough at it.  I listened to local bands and never really got to know them.  I was reserved.  And this film Once kinda touched me one evening and probably helped push me forward to meeting and getting to know people more. Plus it has a fantastic soundtrack.  Follow The Swell Season, very talented musicians.

This video has incorporated clips from the film to the song "Falling Slowly" by The Swell Season.



More info: Wikipedia article for film and soundtrack. Wikipedia article for The Swell Season. IMDB for film info and trailers. Listen to or purchase soundtrack on Amazon.

Crazy Heart
This last one was a recent recommendation from a friend who knows my taste in music and film and likes much of the same himself. So when he mentioned he liked this movie and the theme song, "The Weary Kind" written by Ryan Bingham, I followed through and gave it a watch and listen. Immediately I fell into it. The film has a strong plot and dialogue that pulled on the same strings that let me love Love Song for Bobby Long so much.  The theme song pulls the film together, and some familiar personalities I know might relate to the lyrics in a small way.  I tend to be drawn to movies that have a central character who copes with alcohol problems and usually comes out on top, even there's some sacrifices or mistakes along the way.  This is that movie, and Jeff Bridges is an exceptional actor.

I listened to "The Weary Kind" and loved it, and then decided to find other songs by Ryan Bingham.  I have one of his earlier albums now, Dead Horses, on which I love "Southside of Heaven" and "Don't Wait For Me" especially. (These links are to YouTube videos for the songs or to the musician's website.)

Since the film just came out in 2009 and may still be in theatres, I can only find the trailer for showing, but it is a good one nonetheless.



More info: Wikipedia article for film and soundtrack. Wikipedia article for Ryan Bingham. IMDB for film info and trailers. Listen to or purchase soundtrack on Amazon.

eclectic me

Reboot.  My blog was just not conforming to the appearance I wanted it to be, so I just deleted the whole thing. Of course, I exported it and saved all the entries since 2007, but it was time to start anew completely.  This blog has moved from one persona to the next, one mission to another.  Now it will be whatever interests me, whatever I want to share.  It will be the eclectic me.

And hopefully I will gain a few followers!  Don't be shy!

trunk bars

So I came across a post on ReadyMade where they converted a suitcase into a rolling bar.  I love it.  It is cute, reuses something that would either end up in the dump or in someone's attic, and it serves a purpose: fun!  So I posted my interest in making one of these on my facebook profile and promptly got a response from my mom that we have a steamer trunk in the barn.  Next time she visits me she'll try packing it in the car so I can have it and do this conversion.  Awesome news!  I like to drink a bit of wine and would love to have a specific place to store unopened bottles, glasses, corkscrews, and other items.  Plus, I keep a few bottles of bourbon and this would be the ideal place to store those as well.

I couldn't remember what the steamer trunk looked like.  Mom described it to refresh my memory: "The steamer trunk is meant to stand on end and opens up -- drawers on one side and the other side is where you hang clothes. People used these years ago when they would travel on ocean liners to Europe, etc. It served as a moveable wardrobe (closet)."  So we have one with drawers!  OH fun!  I can't wait for her to visit sometime in the summer or late spring!  Maybe I will convert it to look more like this one:

pantry redesign

I was tired of bags and boxes in my pantry all jumbled up together. I've also become a little more sensitive and/or annoyed at advertising everywhere I look, so emptying my pantry of most of that "product placement" feeling makes it feel downright me.  I also have this new-found love of mason jars.  So I decided to do something about the mess and make looking in my pantry/cabinet a little more exciting to me.  As a photographer, I love to see bright colors and patterns in nature, so seeing the grains, pastas, beans, etc., through clear jars instead of hidden in rolled up bags and crushed boxes makes me happy.

I also picked up a couple brightly colored baskets from a department store.  These have little packets of spices I got at farmers' markets and soup mixes.  I still have to get some more jars; I bought 24 and I still need some for the flour and sugar.

need you now

I hate to say it, but every time I am listening to the radio in my car -- that doesn't have a CD player -- I hear that song by Lady Antebellum, "Need You Now", and I actually like it. It's not a song that will go down in my top 100 best songs ever written. That list is reserved for Patty Griffin, Neko Case, Tom Waits, Leonard Cohen, Ryan Adams, Gillian Welch, and plenty of others that I love.  But there's a few of the lyrics in that song that tug at something in me that I just won't let go.  I guess the heart doesn't want to give up on something it feels is true, one day, if not now. Or else I'm a fool. Both, or neither, is possible, surely.

"Picture perfect memories scattered all around the floor,
Reachin' for the phone cause I can't fight it anymore,
And I wonder if I ever crossed your mind.
For me, it happens all the time.

Its a quarter after one, I'm all alone and I need you now.
Said I wouldn't call but I lost all control and I need you now.
And I don't know how I can do without.
I just need you now."

Now, what I relate to in the song is the memories of conversation, smiles, laughter, and how we have managed to keep it up over the phone from time to time. I was just thinking a little while ago about a conversation in June and it almost felt like that was just a few weeks ago. That was over 8 months ago! And yes, I know I think of this person quite often, but one cannot help but wonder if another thinks of them. It is nice to receive a message, sent with such person as if we were sitting across a table from each other, and it opens with I was just thinking of you...

fabric flowers, birds, turtles...

Today I attended for the first time a group of crafty people who meet, socialize, and craft on their projects at the same time.  Some were crocheting, others weaving, some making papers flowers, others collaging.  I brought fabric and paper stencils to cut out birds, turtles, butterflies, bees, and flowers.  I plan to use the spray-starch method of application to the cabinet doors in my kitchen.  For nearly a year I have had this idea in my head and I am finally getting around to doing it.  This nature-in-fabric-on-the-walls idea all started when I decided to put a tree in my living room:

Since I rent, I didn't want to actually try painting a tree on the wall only to have to repaint the walls before leaving this house, if I choose to move any time soon.  By the way, I just put a brown slipcover on the loveseat.  It looks much better now.

I have seen adhesive vinyl decals of really neat designs online, but they all were out of my budget range.  Then I learned of a friend who couldn't paint the walls in her bathroom in her rental apartment, so she applied a light-weight cotton fabric to the walls with spray starch.  Voila!  Wallpaper without the hassle, and when you move out simply spray with water, peel off the fabric, clean the walls of the residue and you're done!  So I thought, I can do this instead of purchasing vinyl decals!

Looking for some tutorials on how to do this?  Try here.  Someone tried out a mod design on a door. Or check out ohdeedoh's How To: Make Fabric Wall Silhouettes.  Strange how I didn't see these pages back in December 2008 when I created the tree in my living room.

crazy heart

Someone dear to my heart shot me an email a few days ago sharing some music he's been listening to lately, and a movie he'd seen and liked a lot. The movie, Crazy Heart, is about a old country musician, Bad Blake, truckin' from one hole-in-the-wall gig to another, drinkin' his days away with McClure's straight whiskey until he passes out, wakes and stumbles back out the door to drive his wagon to the next gig, sometimes over 300 miles away. He's bitter with disappointment and lack of enthusiastic support from his agent, and still holds a grudge against a younger musician who he mentored and whose popularity has soared. Bad meets a young reporter who asks some questions he cannot deny tugged at something he buried inside. Thus, the movie moves forward, the human condition transforms, self-realization and sacrifice, and giving in to a little hope and a lot of hard work, Bad becomes good. I won't spoil what transpires. I saw the movie in the theatre late last night, exiting into after-midnight crisp February air and the stars sparkling like the whiskey in Bad's glass. I slept with Ryan Bingham's song "The Weary Kind" echoing in my head, dreamed of a field at mid-afternoon in Oklahoma with tall weeds bending in the wind, and woke with the song still playing:

"And this ain't no place for the weary kind,
And this ain't no place to lose your mind,
And this ain't no place to fall behind.
Pick up your crazy heart and give it one more try."

He mentioned that he'd had the song in his head, too. Knew that the song impressed him in some way. So I looked for more by Ryan Bingham. Turns out, his song written as the theme for Crazy Heart is up for an Oscar this March 2010. Way to go! I found his first album, Dead Horses, out there in blogland, and have it playing now. "Southside of Heaven" and "Don't Wait For Me" are favorites that still resonate -- lyrics and rhythms -- through me even after they have ended. So, I am impressed and drifting more to country that still hangs onto an honest sound, rather than succumbing to a country-pop-rock blur. I favor him as a soloist than as Ryan Bingham and The Dead Horses, but they're still really good. Be sure to check out all his albums.

"Along them Louisiana byways and lonesome highways, roll on.
Won't you take me where the poor man lives; its where I call my home.
And can't you see that a breeze is nothing but a change in pace.
Money can't buy my soul 'cause it comes from a hard-earned place.


But on the southside of Heaven, won't you take me home,
'Cause I've been gone for so long, and lord, and it's getting cold."

sunday sunset 1-24-2010

I went to Lake Hefner around 4pm to walk for a while. I pulled out my old running shoes, still a little dusty from being worn for a hike or camping trip, and tied them on.  I get started walking, not in the power-walk way or too slow of a stroll either, just fast enough to keep beat to some of the faster paced songs on my music player.  Then I started getting bothered by the upper heal of both shoes, the part that rubs against the back of my ankle.  I stop at a bench, take off the shoes, and tug and pull to stretch the shoe some and bend back the upper heal. This doesn't really make much of a difference. I'm already a good way in, so it's okay to turn back now.  I'd been walking for about 30 minutes. Plus, I had stopped to take a few pictures until the battery in my camera died.  I just knew it would before I left home!

So I finally get all the way back to my car, realize I have a couple of batteries that work, but I don't know for how long.  I just want to capture the sunset again. So I sit by this solitary tree for another 30-40 minutes, thinking, exploring ideas for the next poetry book, thinking about people, and listening to the songs on my music player. I realize my left ankle feels stiff, so I check it out.  Apparently it did blister and bleed.  The little elastic pull loop at the upper heal of the shoes had worn through and had rubbed at my ankle until it bled.  Oh great. Ouch.

But at least I got some pretty sunset pictures (look at the Lake Hefner set on flickr) and I did manage to walk around an hour total.  :)