I hope I can remember this dream long enough because I can't write everything about it now.
I took off Thursday to go to NYC for a show at Mo Pitkins in NYC, more specifically Manhattan. I don't think I was driving my Mazda, but it felt like it. It felt like my car, but I don't remember what it looked like. I doubt my actual car could get me to NYC much less through all that traffic. Anyway, I get up there and I end up running into this couple I somehow I knew. I guess suddenly Wednesday night instead of Thursday 'cause I stayed with them that night. They were so hospitable and the lady and I talked a lot. She told me she needed to go to this storage center which had her ancestors' belongings, but she'd not been able to go. So I convinced her that I would take her and we all three went. When we got there suddenly the couple had two kids, one boy and one girl, both about 5-7 years old. The girl had pigtails and boy was wearing blue or orange, I don't remember. But when we got to the storage unit there were all these very old and antique tea sets and beads and crystal and china, and she didn't know that they'd had that. The propetier was like, wow, I never knew what was in there. from everyone's expression I could tell that what was there was worth quite a lot of money and I began to worry about the couple's safety. So I said I have a big grey box in my car (now it sounds exactly like my car, cause I do have a big grey plastic box in it right now) and I offered to go get it, bring it down, and help them pack it with these items. So we did that. This all took place EARLY Thursday morning after I had already stayed the night at their apartment.
After that, I jump to being in a coffee shop. It is now Thursday around 11 or Noon. I ended up running into Michael, who is also on Myspace, and Brice. They're a couple in this dream (although Brice in real life isn't gay). Well, I am talking them about my plans to find this show and make it there in time. After a while I realize that I have a lot of miles to drive because I am on the southside of NYC and Manhattan is somewhere on the Northeast side (I really don't know where it is, but in my dream that's where I was and where I thought it was, it meant that I was really running out of time). While we were sitting there, for some reason these highschool aged girls with blonde hair in ponytails and braces came up and were asking Michael and Brice to sign their yearbooks. No one asked me to sign their book, and I felt a little left out, but I figured I had better get going anyway.
So I got into my car and left again, hit the road driving on highways and freeways. I also drove some streets I didn't know. It took a while. Then I was suddenly inside this building, in a room with dim light, lamps turned on but they have scarfs laid over them to soften the light. There's a lot of texture in this room, fabric and color, but its dim and the brightness isn't overbearing.
There's a woman who I perceive to be Mo Pitkins. Somehow I think there's a woman who owns this establishment by that name. And I recognize Bitch cause I had seen her before on stage. She was talking to Mo Pitkins, and they were working on styling someone's hair. The girl they were styling looked a little like Shane on The L Word, but it wasn't Kate M. There was a group of people coming in the other door across the room from me (Bitch, Mo Pitkins, and Shane-look-a-like were to the right of me, same side of the room, in a small adjoining room) and I guess Daniela Sea came in just before the crowd 'cause she was standing with her back to the wall, facing the room, as the people came in through the door. She said hello to some of them, got into conversation with them, but before that she'd seen me and I saw her eyes even though the room seemed dim.
Then I found out this was not the location of the show. I wasn't in Manhattan yet, and I still had some driving to do. I left, and started driving again, but I kept thinking, why didn't I just stay with them until the show, follow them so I wouldn't get lost, because obviously they are IN the show. But I was driving, and then I woke up.
Wow... that's the first time I recall ever having a dream with famous people in it, as far as people who act, perform music, travel for it to make a living...
Thursday, March 2, 2006
Wednesday, March 1, 2006
archive: 1 march 2006: wednesday night writing exercise
Dipped in shadow the juniper's green leaves seem warm in the sunset. The sky is water-colored blue, dark fading to light blue on the horizon. I almost feel as if I can dive into the cool blue above -- water dripping from body to sizzle on sun-tanned rocks by the tree. But I enter into the shadow rocks, cool touch of sandstone in shade, the evening is coming, temperature dropping, reflecting the cold bright blue of sky. Clouds mist up from the gold-bathed rocks into the pale horizon, as if the sunburned ground is cooking the last bit of water dropped from some sad camper's spilt canteen.
This juniper, she grows near Delicate Arch. She's as delicate as the Arch itself, sensitive to the temperature's incline and decline, but strong enough to last through the desert's freezing cold nights.
Utah imagines being as glorious as New Mexico or Arizona -- possibly it is so, but I wouldn't know. I didn't go on this trip, and I didn't shoot this picture I describe. I don't know if someone had just risen from a pool to sprinkle those sun-tanned rocks with droplets of water, steaming mists towards the deep water blue sky above. For all I know, the photographer probably climbed a mountain just for this picture, sweating under the weight of her camera equipment -- a Canon AE-1 SLR, a tripod, several lenses including a telephoto one, plus a canteen of water, a blanket for resting, and something to eat -- all snugly shoved into a navy blue duffle bag on her back. And I know the photographer is female by her name -- Emily -- and maybe 30 minutes had gone by before she set up her equipment, finally having caught her breath and slowed pulse. Then, looking up to see the night arriving fast, quickly snapped several pictures breathlessly, hoping she didn't load the film incorrectly or angled the camera off-balance. The damn tripod would not level and she knew then that she should have bought the one $30 more expensive than this one.
But two weeks later, back in Berea, Kentucky, after having developed nine rolls of film from this trip, she discovers this gem: watercolored blue skies to pale horizons, misty clouds rising as steam, sunburned rock endlessly sunning, and a solitary juniper tree in dark green shadow, curved as if to bow, saying, "Welcome to Delicate Arch."
This juniper, she grows near Delicate Arch. She's as delicate as the Arch itself, sensitive to the temperature's incline and decline, but strong enough to last through the desert's freezing cold nights.
Utah imagines being as glorious as New Mexico or Arizona -- possibly it is so, but I wouldn't know. I didn't go on this trip, and I didn't shoot this picture I describe. I don't know if someone had just risen from a pool to sprinkle those sun-tanned rocks with droplets of water, steaming mists towards the deep water blue sky above. For all I know, the photographer probably climbed a mountain just for this picture, sweating under the weight of her camera equipment -- a Canon AE-1 SLR, a tripod, several lenses including a telephoto one, plus a canteen of water, a blanket for resting, and something to eat -- all snugly shoved into a navy blue duffle bag on her back. And I know the photographer is female by her name -- Emily -- and maybe 30 minutes had gone by before she set up her equipment, finally having caught her breath and slowed pulse. Then, looking up to see the night arriving fast, quickly snapped several pictures breathlessly, hoping she didn't load the film incorrectly or angled the camera off-balance. The damn tripod would not level and she knew then that she should have bought the one $30 more expensive than this one.
But two weeks later, back in Berea, Kentucky, after having developed nine rolls of film from this trip, she discovers this gem: watercolored blue skies to pale horizons, misty clouds rising as steam, sunburned rock endlessly sunning, and a solitary juniper tree in dark green shadow, curved as if to bow, saying, "Welcome to Delicate Arch."
Saturday, February 25, 2006
archive: 25 february 2006: trip to louisville
I had the strangest dream. A friend of mine I no longer have a crush on... I apparently was dating her in this dream. Anyway, there was some odd weird tension or something. And we were driving around, she was driving, and she pulled over in a parking lot somewhere and randomly said, "I got a tattoo! It is Dino!" And she pulled her sweatpants down a little from her hip, just enough to show that she'd got this bright purple dinosaur with black spots on her hip. It was crazy, and whatever I was sad about disappeared and we were laughing so hard. Then I woke.
I am being unbelievably slow this morning. Well, its not unbelievable 'cause I am always like this on Saturday and Sunday mornings. So I didn't wake up at 7:30 but snoozed till almost 9. I gotta get ready and get going to Louisville 'cause that is going to take a while. And then I want to get back to Lexington by 6 p.m. 'cause there's a Mardi Gras parade going on and I would like to try to take pictures.
And my CD hasn't shown up, but I guess if the mail comes within the next 20 minutes (it really shouldn't take me any longer than that to get ready) maybe the mailman will have my CD. If not, then the waiting begins again on Monday. Well, the 3 from CDBaby.com came in though. It'll suffice for now. hehe
I am being unbelievably slow this morning. Well, its not unbelievable 'cause I am always like this on Saturday and Sunday mornings. So I didn't wake up at 7:30 but snoozed till almost 9. I gotta get ready and get going to Louisville 'cause that is going to take a while. And then I want to get back to Lexington by 6 p.m. 'cause there's a Mardi Gras parade going on and I would like to try to take pictures.
And my CD hasn't shown up, but I guess if the mail comes within the next 20 minutes (it really shouldn't take me any longer than that to get ready) maybe the mailman will have my CD. If not, then the waiting begins again on Monday. Well, the 3 from CDBaby.com came in though. It'll suffice for now. hehe
Monday, February 20, 2006
archive: 20 february 2006: thinking, family, writing
I feel like writing but I don't really have anything significant to say. I feel like there's a story I should tell but I don't know whose story to tell. And I don't feel I have all the facts, and I could embelish and fill in the gaps with imagination, thinking logically what might have happened in the places I was not involved, but I feel as if that is lying. If I don't have the facts, I don't tell the story.
I really need to write about my grandmother. Both of them actually. The one, Boo, who I grew up with knowing and who lived next door to my family all my adolescent years. And there's the grandmother I never met. Both have passed away. Boo died November of 2004. And Lucy Baker died last Monday morning. I still have to write cards to my aunts and uncles. The complete story about Lucy is one I will probably never have, because people never talk negatively about the dead. The bits I think I know include a turning away from her children when her husband abused one of her daughters. And when that daughter came to her and told her what happened, she didn't believe her daughter, and stayed with him. To me, that is a frightening story. I need to go to West Virginia and see my aunt. I've only met her twice and she is one of the sweetest women alive. Maybe I will see her sometime in the summer for a weekend.
I should get back to work. I have a headache though, and I'd rather not work with something mundane. Reading other people's entries have made me want to write about family. I should spend time writing about each family member... everything that I know. A few weeks ago I sat in Live Wire and wrote in a notebook a list of things which reminded me of my grandmother, Boo, both good and bad. I have some fond memories of her, and I have memories I don't recall - if that makes sense - of her being very mean. Mom told me of afternoons coming back from her trailer crying because she'd been mean to me. Afterall, she was an alcoholic, but I didn't know that back then. I knew my dad was an alcoholic, but I didn't realize my grandmother was one too. I didn't make any connections; I only associated certains actions and behavior with certain labels.
I never said I wasn't naive. Oh, I was very naive.
back to work. I shall write more later sometime.
I really need to write about my grandmother. Both of them actually. The one, Boo, who I grew up with knowing and who lived next door to my family all my adolescent years. And there's the grandmother I never met. Both have passed away. Boo died November of 2004. And Lucy Baker died last Monday morning. I still have to write cards to my aunts and uncles. The complete story about Lucy is one I will probably never have, because people never talk negatively about the dead. The bits I think I know include a turning away from her children when her husband abused one of her daughters. And when that daughter came to her and told her what happened, she didn't believe her daughter, and stayed with him. To me, that is a frightening story. I need to go to West Virginia and see my aunt. I've only met her twice and she is one of the sweetest women alive. Maybe I will see her sometime in the summer for a weekend.
I should get back to work. I have a headache though, and I'd rather not work with something mundane. Reading other people's entries have made me want to write about family. I should spend time writing about each family member... everything that I know. A few weeks ago I sat in Live Wire and wrote in a notebook a list of things which reminded me of my grandmother, Boo, both good and bad. I have some fond memories of her, and I have memories I don't recall - if that makes sense - of her being very mean. Mom told me of afternoons coming back from her trailer crying because she'd been mean to me. Afterall, she was an alcoholic, but I didn't know that back then. I knew my dad was an alcoholic, but I didn't realize my grandmother was one too. I didn't make any connections; I only associated certains actions and behavior with certain labels.
I never said I wasn't naive. Oh, I was very naive.
back to work. I shall write more later sometime.
Saturday, February 18, 2006
archive: 18 february 2006: louisville saturdays
I should sleep. I am going to try to get up early tomorrow, get some flapjacks at Ground Effects, then head to Louisville to put up flyers promoting the Melissa Ferrick March 25th show in all the coffeeshops I can find (I already have addresses - I just need to map it out). Then I am going out. There should be much fun.
I don't know how late I will be getting back Saturday night/Sunday morning. I imagine I will get back like 6 a.m. and crash asleep for 6 hours. hehehe...
But hey... you guitar and varied-string-instrument playing friends... if you wanna come over early on Sunday to play around and jam, that's totally cool with me. Anytime after Noon will be spectacular. Give me a call... 859-200-9849 Or Text Message me at the same number.
Oh... I got a text message for valentine's from someone's phone I didn't know, and I texted back asking who it was, but they never responded. I wonder who it was...
I don't know how late I will be getting back Saturday night/Sunday morning. I imagine I will get back like 6 a.m. and crash asleep for 6 hours. hehehe...
But hey... you guitar and varied-string-instrument playing friends... if you wanna come over early on Sunday to play around and jam, that's totally cool with me. Anytime after Noon will be spectacular. Give me a call... 859-200-9849 Or Text Message me at the same number.
Oh... I got a text message for valentine's from someone's phone I didn't know, and I texted back asking who it was, but they never responded. I wonder who it was...
archive: 18 february 2006: plans vs. snow
This snow makes me nervous. But I am gonna try to go about my plans like I planned. I should be leaving Berea by Noon. By the time I get to Louisville hopefully the roads won't be so bad.
I better get cracking.
Oh, and this snow doesn't look like the friendly stuff we had last weekend. This snow looks like sleet in disguise. Be careful.
*hugs*
EDIT: I am a dumbass and got all the way to Lexington before I realized I had left the fliers at home. I drove back and decided that I wasn't going to go to Louisville afterall.
I better get cracking.
Oh, and this snow doesn't look like the friendly stuff we had last weekend. This snow looks like sleet in disguise. Be careful.
*hugs*
EDIT: I am a dumbass and got all the way to Lexington before I realized I had left the fliers at home. I drove back and decided that I wasn't going to go to Louisville afterall.
archive: 18 february 2006: did I decide right
I don't know. I just feel like staying right here. Maybe there are all kinds of possibilities, and maybe there's not. But with or without help bad things could have happened on the way. I feel like an ass though. I don't know.
I need to take my car to the shop sometime this week. Everytime I look at it the front driver side tire seems lower... It probably needs replacing. And its probably time for another oil change. And I know my brakes need replacing.... I was holding off till I had another paycheck.
I wish I was saving money. As long as I can get through this month without having to do a check advance thing then I will have broken that nasty circle and will begin having financial control again. Possibly get to save. Unfortunately I won't be able to save as easily as I would have been with a roommate. Actually, I need to be saving money. Shit... August is going to be here before I know it. It is almost the end of February already. I am dreading this... everything.
And sometimes I hate my bed.
I am going to work on my webpage now for a while... I need to change up the way the poems and stories post.
I need to take my car to the shop sometime this week. Everytime I look at it the front driver side tire seems lower... It probably needs replacing. And its probably time for another oil change. And I know my brakes need replacing.... I was holding off till I had another paycheck.
I wish I was saving money. As long as I can get through this month without having to do a check advance thing then I will have broken that nasty circle and will begin having financial control again. Possibly get to save. Unfortunately I won't be able to save as easily as I would have been with a roommate. Actually, I need to be saving money. Shit... August is going to be here before I know it. It is almost the end of February already. I am dreading this... everything.
And sometimes I hate my bed.
I am going to work on my webpage now for a while... I need to change up the way the poems and stories post.
Friday, February 17, 2006
archive: 17 february 2006: some late/early thoughts
yeah... I am still awake.
I came home and I downloaded everything I have uploaded on my website server... I downloaded it all so that I would reorganize things, delete what is not being used, minimize crap, have copies of crap, etc. Yeah... the geek in me. Now I am tired and going to sleep... I will finish it later....
I also know I need to go back and re-do the writing pages of my website... I need to do it differently, without the pop-ups of the individual poems or stories... That's just too much and some people have that blocked on their browsers so when they click the link, nothing seems to happen. heh. And I need to update the writing there. I'll update it and it will have the most recent stuff, the poems dealing with sexuality, my dad, everything. And I will see how that goes. And I will TRY to update it with whatever I come up with from free-writing... I like the things I have been creating this week... I know they're just verbal photographs. Verbose snapshots. But I like that sort of thing, and if I like that, there's other people who do....
Been listening to Portishead in the later hours this evening....
And once again I have impulse of love in me.... I miss people, I love them, and I am so thankful I have friends... I know that if/when/where I move there will be several of you who I will be able to keep in touch with and likewise you'll return the correspondence. No one knows just how much I value that connection, even if its spread out over 846 miles. It sends me beyond happiness.
This weekend should be great. Going to see The Vagina Monologues Friday night in Richmond. Going Saturday to Louisville in the morning and staying till late evening. Sunday.... I am not sure what I will do with my morning - pictures? go to Union Church (I dunno, for some reason I have impulse to wanna attend at least one service while I live in Berea)? Sleep? Possibly pictures in the afternoon? Maybe music? But I look forward to Sunday evening... The L Word friends coming to hang out and watch the show.
Much love.
I came home and I downloaded everything I have uploaded on my website server... I downloaded it all so that I would reorganize things, delete what is not being used, minimize crap, have copies of crap, etc. Yeah... the geek in me. Now I am tired and going to sleep... I will finish it later....
I also know I need to go back and re-do the writing pages of my website... I need to do it differently, without the pop-ups of the individual poems or stories... That's just too much and some people have that blocked on their browsers so when they click the link, nothing seems to happen. heh. And I need to update the writing there. I'll update it and it will have the most recent stuff, the poems dealing with sexuality, my dad, everything. And I will see how that goes. And I will TRY to update it with whatever I come up with from free-writing... I like the things I have been creating this week... I know they're just verbal photographs. Verbose snapshots. But I like that sort of thing, and if I like that, there's other people who do....
Been listening to Portishead in the later hours this evening....
And once again I have impulse of love in me.... I miss people, I love them, and I am so thankful I have friends... I know that if/when/where I move there will be several of you who I will be able to keep in touch with and likewise you'll return the correspondence. No one knows just how much I value that connection, even if its spread out over 846 miles. It sends me beyond happiness.
This weekend should be great. Going to see The Vagina Monologues Friday night in Richmond. Going Saturday to Louisville in the morning and staying till late evening. Sunday.... I am not sure what I will do with my morning - pictures? go to Union Church (I dunno, for some reason I have impulse to wanna attend at least one service while I live in Berea)? Sleep? Possibly pictures in the afternoon? Maybe music? But I look forward to Sunday evening... The L Word friends coming to hang out and watch the show.
Much love.
archive: 17 february 2006: will you be the one
I've had this song in my head ALL DAY today and last night... I love this song, but its an odd one to have right now as it does not have anyone to refer to in my life, no romantic interest, no crush... Sure, there are some people I really like and if things were to happen I wouldn't stop them (unless, of course, they are committed to someone else) but the liklihood of that stuff happening is in the negative. heh. So here's some great lyrics. Thank you, Melissa, for singing so wonderfully.
will you be the one i've wanted?
will you read my mind?
will you ask me where i hurt
and heal me with your eyes?
will i look at you with wonder
and never doubt our love?
yeah, are you the one
that i've been dreaming of?
yeah. yeah.
run around my head
and i rehearse our introduction.
run around in my car,
i find the best way to your house.
and even though i have never seen you
from what my friends tell me,
you are walking grace.
so who would've thought i'd be sitting here
thinking my future could be right down the street.
after all the loves i have lost over borders and over states.
and now i found out, yeah that you and i, we drink coffee
at the very same place.
so could you be the one?
will you be the one i've wanted?
will you read my mind?
will you ask me where i hurt
and heal me with your eyes?
will i look at you with wonder
and never doubt our love?
yeah, are you be the one
that i've been dreaming of?
yeah, yeah.
i guess i am a hopeless romantic.
i am full of pretty lines.
it's also true what you have heard about me
i fall in love every time.
so please let me down easy
if i am not what you want.
would you let me down easy
i've got a really weak heart.
yeah, yeah.
so could you be the one?
will you be the one i've wanted?
will you read my mind?
will you ask me where i hurt
and heal me with your eyes?
will i look at you with wonder
and never doubt our love?
yeah, are you be the one
that i've been dreaming of?
will you be the one i've wanted?
- Melissa Ferrick, "Will You Be the One?"
will you be the one i've wanted?
will you read my mind?
will you ask me where i hurt
and heal me with your eyes?
will i look at you with wonder
and never doubt our love?
yeah, are you the one
that i've been dreaming of?
yeah. yeah.
run around my head
and i rehearse our introduction.
run around in my car,
i find the best way to your house.
and even though i have never seen you
from what my friends tell me,
you are walking grace.
so who would've thought i'd be sitting here
thinking my future could be right down the street.
after all the loves i have lost over borders and over states.
and now i found out, yeah that you and i, we drink coffee
at the very same place.
so could you be the one?
will you be the one i've wanted?
will you read my mind?
will you ask me where i hurt
and heal me with your eyes?
will i look at you with wonder
and never doubt our love?
yeah, are you be the one
that i've been dreaming of?
yeah, yeah.
i guess i am a hopeless romantic.
i am full of pretty lines.
it's also true what you have heard about me
i fall in love every time.
so please let me down easy
if i am not what you want.
would you let me down easy
i've got a really weak heart.
yeah, yeah.
so could you be the one?
will you be the one i've wanted?
will you read my mind?
will you ask me where i hurt
and heal me with your eyes?
will i look at you with wonder
and never doubt our love?
yeah, are you be the one
that i've been dreaming of?
will you be the one i've wanted?
- Melissa Ferrick, "Will You Be the One?"
Thursday, February 16, 2006
archive: 16 february 2006: road trips, work, and the project
ok.
This summer will consist of a LOT of driving, a LOT of pictures, and so therefore, a LOT of weekend trips to places... I don't know if I would get hotels, or camp, or find someone who will let me stay with them somewhere.... Or maybe it would be an ALL DAY Saturday sort of thing, drive three hours to a county, mapped out plan of places to go to, and then drive those thee hours back late evening. Don't know, but those are my Saturdays.... maybe.
At least that is what I want to do. So maybe this part-time job to save money should be in the weekday evenings? Oh Sigh!
So... you're asking, what counties in Kentucky do you want to go to?
Knox, Bell, Harlan, Knott, Leslie, Perry, Breathitt, Owsley, Floyd, and Pike.
Why these counties? The mountains, wildlife, and the history I know from these CSM papers.
I also want to go to West Virginia a couple times. I need to go to Cranberry Glade and to a few places Rachel W. mentioned. I also have relatives in West Virginia I need to go visit for a weekend since I am here... I can't remember exactly which towns! I think one is Farmington or Morgantown, I can't remember. I think that its North West Virginia.
Anyway, for my weekend trips, anyone will be welcome to come with me. And hopefully my car will be able to withstand it. hehe
OK.... back to work. I am so excited about this summer... not just the trips, but also the work I will begin doing here in the archives... the webpage, the display case, the finding aid... Its going to be so MUCH and I am such a GEEK about it.
This summer will consist of a LOT of driving, a LOT of pictures, and so therefore, a LOT of weekend trips to places... I don't know if I would get hotels, or camp, or find someone who will let me stay with them somewhere.... Or maybe it would be an ALL DAY Saturday sort of thing, drive three hours to a county, mapped out plan of places to go to, and then drive those thee hours back late evening. Don't know, but those are my Saturdays.... maybe.
At least that is what I want to do. So maybe this part-time job to save money should be in the weekday evenings? Oh Sigh!
So... you're asking, what counties in Kentucky do you want to go to?
Knox, Bell, Harlan, Knott, Leslie, Perry, Breathitt, Owsley, Floyd, and Pike.
Why these counties? The mountains, wildlife, and the history I know from these CSM papers.
I also want to go to West Virginia a couple times. I need to go to Cranberry Glade and to a few places Rachel W. mentioned. I also have relatives in West Virginia I need to go visit for a weekend since I am here... I can't remember exactly which towns! I think one is Farmington or Morgantown, I can't remember. I think that its North West Virginia.
Anyway, for my weekend trips, anyone will be welcome to come with me. And hopefully my car will be able to withstand it. hehe
OK.... back to work. I am so excited about this summer... not just the trips, but also the work I will begin doing here in the archives... the webpage, the display case, the finding aid... Its going to be so MUCH and I am such a GEEK about it.
archive: 16 february 2006: oh dear V
During my lunch break I wrote something on both sides of a napkin at Berea Coffee and Tea. It was spurred on by something a woman there said. My writing seems to always need to be grounded in some factual bit, some bit of reality that actually happened, and then the rest can be imaginative.... So here is what I wrote:
"What does that mean?" she asked, pointing with a sharp finger at the "V" on her coffee cup lid.
The V seemed so stark, a thin-lined letter on a black plastic lid. It could mean anything and this is what scared her suddenly: a black mark on her self, a letter signifying something unknown even to herself. Any manner of label could point to her -- vicious, virgin, voluptuous, vixen, virile, vacant, vigorous, vibrant, vague. She could be any of these. It could define her body: vaginal, vacuous, virginal, virile. She didn't want to be known by one defining word, especially not one with a V.
"I'm not a virgin or vixen. I'm not vicious and I am not voluptuous, whatever that is supposed to mean," she said as she glanced down at her Dolly Parton bosom. "I'm not vacant. I have heart, feelings -- I care damnit! I'm not in a rush for no reason. I've got things to do to help people!"
Her neighbors on stools turned their heads away, as the barista looked at her and simply said, "The V is for Vanilla Nut, the Flavor of the Day, like you ordered."
"What does that mean?" she asked, pointing with a sharp finger at the "V" on her coffee cup lid.
The V seemed so stark, a thin-lined letter on a black plastic lid. It could mean anything and this is what scared her suddenly: a black mark on her self, a letter signifying something unknown even to herself. Any manner of label could point to her -- vicious, virgin, voluptuous, vixen, virile, vacant, vigorous, vibrant, vague. She could be any of these. It could define her body: vaginal, vacuous, virginal, virile. She didn't want to be known by one defining word, especially not one with a V.
"I'm not a virgin or vixen. I'm not vicious and I am not voluptuous, whatever that is supposed to mean," she said as she glanced down at her Dolly Parton bosom. "I'm not vacant. I have heart, feelings -- I care damnit! I'm not in a rush for no reason. I've got things to do to help people!"
Her neighbors on stools turned their heads away, as the barista looked at her and simply said, "The V is for Vanilla Nut, the Flavor of the Day, like you ordered."
archive: 16 february 2006: photo news
also...
I sold THREE of my pictures today to Steve and Terese G.
wow...
Two of the statues from the Lexington cemetery and one of flowers... yellow and purple. I love the ones they picked. And I love how they eliminated the ones they didn't like as much and why. It was good.
$100 made just like that...
I know I should be good with it... I should make it spread out over the rest of the month with the rest of my paycheck... But I am probably going to spend a third of it this weekend...
These are the three that they bought:
Little Angel
Aquarius
Lemon Symphony
And Patty T. bought one a little over a week ago, this one:
Gold
I sold THREE of my pictures today to Steve and Terese G.
wow...
Two of the statues from the Lexington cemetery and one of flowers... yellow and purple. I love the ones they picked. And I love how they eliminated the ones they didn't like as much and why. It was good.
$100 made just like that...
I know I should be good with it... I should make it spread out over the rest of the month with the rest of my paycheck... But I am probably going to spend a third of it this weekend...
These are the three that they bought:
Little Angel
Aquarius
Lemon Symphony
And Patty T. bought one a little over a week ago, this one:
Gold
archive: 16 february 2006: coffeeshop writing
She sits on the high stools at the table by the wall where she can see the entire coffeeshop from her perch. The lone acoustic guitarist strums mellow songs... eventually he comes to singing "Will the Circle Be Unbroken." A table of three guys talk about poetry, a distant generation of the beatniks who forgot thei black shirts for charcoal grey sweaters and muted-green t-shirts paired with jeans or pin-striped slacks. They're not smoking because of the city's "smoke-free environment laws," or maybe, just maybe they are non-smokers in this small college town. Afterall, it is a dry town - no alcohol sold anywhere except for at least another 10 miles towards Richmond at Monty's Liquor Store. Oh, no... there goes two now, reaching into back pockets for that hard pack of Malboros or Camels. The poetry the boys are reading comes from books titled Post Modern American Poetry and Modernist Words to Live By.
There is a changing of the guard at the mic -- open-mic night at Ground Effects -- and a new guitarist is tuning his honey-stained guitar. Across from him is a friend also tuning -- maybe they will collaborate a tune or two.
About four or five teenagers are talking at the couch -- one girl is standing, blonde hair falling to veil her right eye, and her lips catch a light's highlight from the cheery-flavored lip gloss she wears. One of her boy friends is saying, "And you know Joseph Stalin called me yesterday and asked for his shopping cart back, and Mom told him to shut up and leave her alone."
There's a slow leak in one of the glass mugs, and he returns the cup to the barista while Lee begins a song vaguely sounding like it came from one of Johnny Cash's childhood nightmares -- working in the field behind the family farm with the threat of Father's whip against his backside but also the hope that he'll escape to the riverside for fishing daydreams, only is the soybean picking is done early and Father hasn't arrived home yet. And the boy runs for the river, short pole with a long string, bait dangling from the end, and an eager smile peeking on his lips.
As lee sings, a man answers his obnoxious cell phone -- the juxtaposition of the lyrics and the old man's conversational answers fit, not interrupting, not overlapping, but seemingly a call and response, though they have nothing in common. Lee sings of bad luck too many times, carrying on in spite of the hardships, and the man's conversation -- "Are you coming down here? Ok, I'll come and meet you. Bye."
"Summer's blowing up your skirt but Winter's in your eyes" sings Jack Mahri at the mic now. "God bless Vermont for keeping you fine." The lyrics are strikingly unique and everyone knows it is a tune that should be recorded, burned, published, sold, bought, aired on radio stations, played in concert halls, covered in small college town coffeeshops.
At the barista counter a guy is highlighted in laptop blue glow, stark shadows creasing jawline, Roman nose, furrowed brow.
There is a changing of the guard at the mic -- open-mic night at Ground Effects -- and a new guitarist is tuning his honey-stained guitar. Across from him is a friend also tuning -- maybe they will collaborate a tune or two.
About four or five teenagers are talking at the couch -- one girl is standing, blonde hair falling to veil her right eye, and her lips catch a light's highlight from the cheery-flavored lip gloss she wears. One of her boy friends is saying, "And you know Joseph Stalin called me yesterday and asked for his shopping cart back, and Mom told him to shut up and leave her alone."
There's a slow leak in one of the glass mugs, and he returns the cup to the barista while Lee begins a song vaguely sounding like it came from one of Johnny Cash's childhood nightmares -- working in the field behind the family farm with the threat of Father's whip against his backside but also the hope that he'll escape to the riverside for fishing daydreams, only is the soybean picking is done early and Father hasn't arrived home yet. And the boy runs for the river, short pole with a long string, bait dangling from the end, and an eager smile peeking on his lips.
As lee sings, a man answers his obnoxious cell phone -- the juxtaposition of the lyrics and the old man's conversational answers fit, not interrupting, not overlapping, but seemingly a call and response, though they have nothing in common. Lee sings of bad luck too many times, carrying on in spite of the hardships, and the man's conversation -- "Are you coming down here? Ok, I'll come and meet you. Bye."
"Summer's blowing up your skirt but Winter's in your eyes" sings Jack Mahri at the mic now. "God bless Vermont for keeping you fine." The lyrics are strikingly unique and everyone knows it is a tune that should be recorded, burned, published, sold, bought, aired on radio stations, played in concert halls, covered in small college town coffeeshops.
At the barista counter a guy is highlighted in laptop blue glow, stark shadows creasing jawline, Roman nose, furrowed brow.
Wednesday, February 15, 2006
archive: 15 february 2006: Sepia-toned Longing
This is what I wrote tonight when given this prompt:
"Sepia-toned Longing"
In this old photograph I'm scanning at work there's a couple standing, holding hands. I can almost feel the blush on the cheeks of the woman whose hair is a dark bob, maybe black, possibly chocolate. The dress she wears is a varied shade of old brown. Dark specks of flowers gathered in her right hand, tulips or roses, they are too small to tell. There are faded mountains in the background becoming light sepia waves behind the couple. Her eyes peek beneath her hair at the photographer, almost cautious, nearly daring. Her lover leans toward her, chin resting on her shoulder, lips lifted to give or receive a kiss, playfully and lovingly. A foot kicked back excitedly, while holding her hand firmly for balance. The lover's eyes show not interest in the photographer, but instead are turned towards her, daring her to turn her face and receive the kiss awaiting her. A cascade of blonde hair falls in sepia-highlighted curls down her back, and I imagine her lover turns to give her a kiss after the photographer has shot his picture. Instead, one woman waits eternally for a kiss the other woman will never give so boldly.
I will end up turning this into a poem.
"Sepia-toned Longing"
In this old photograph I'm scanning at work there's a couple standing, holding hands. I can almost feel the blush on the cheeks of the woman whose hair is a dark bob, maybe black, possibly chocolate. The dress she wears is a varied shade of old brown. Dark specks of flowers gathered in her right hand, tulips or roses, they are too small to tell. There are faded mountains in the background becoming light sepia waves behind the couple. Her eyes peek beneath her hair at the photographer, almost cautious, nearly daring. Her lover leans toward her, chin resting on her shoulder, lips lifted to give or receive a kiss, playfully and lovingly. A foot kicked back excitedly, while holding her hand firmly for balance. The lover's eyes show not interest in the photographer, but instead are turned towards her, daring her to turn her face and receive the kiss awaiting her. A cascade of blonde hair falls in sepia-highlighted curls down her back, and I imagine her lover turns to give her a kiss after the photographer has shot his picture. Instead, one woman waits eternally for a kiss the other woman will never give so boldly.
I will end up turning this into a poem.
Monday, February 13, 2006
archive: 13 february: hair, poetic idea, cable
So I styled my hair differently Sunday and today... Someone today thought I had gotten it cut. Other than that, no comments. hrm.
I'll post pics (later) for those of you who haven't seen it. Its nothing big... but I am very conscious of a lot of face, including forehead. I don't know what gets into me sometimes, being all "cover up everything" but then again, its chilly out! I might get some of it cut in a little bit (in the back) though I am not sure exactly how. I really should call Angie's hair person and find out how much she costs and appointment. I just can't spend something like $30-40 on haircut. I just can't.
I thought of something the other day, and I think I forgot the best part of the line, but I remember most of it. It refers to my closet and how I have it organized.... by the colors of the rainbow. Yes... I have a rainbow closet. Sometimes I am in the mood to wear something red and I don't want to have to look everywhere to find something red. Its a lot easier when all color clothing is in one area. Anyway, my line is...
Everyday I come out of the closet.
It sounds ridiculously mundane by itself, but once I get a poem about my clothes and closet and sexuality around it, it'll fit. Because if there's a rainbow in my closet, and I am picking clothes to wear everyday from that rainbow, then I am coming out of the closet everyday. Or something to that extent. Ok. Stop laughing at me.
I am running to radioshack now and see if there's something to split a cable s that it can serve both computer and tv. Amanda will have to get one also if she brings her tv.
I'll post pics (later) for those of you who haven't seen it. Its nothing big... but I am very conscious of a lot of face, including forehead. I don't know what gets into me sometimes, being all "cover up everything" but then again, its chilly out! I might get some of it cut in a little bit (in the back) though I am not sure exactly how. I really should call Angie's hair person and find out how much she costs and appointment. I just can't spend something like $30-40 on haircut. I just can't.
I thought of something the other day, and I think I forgot the best part of the line, but I remember most of it. It refers to my closet and how I have it organized.... by the colors of the rainbow. Yes... I have a rainbow closet. Sometimes I am in the mood to wear something red and I don't want to have to look everywhere to find something red. Its a lot easier when all color clothing is in one area. Anyway, my line is...
Everyday I come out of the closet.
It sounds ridiculously mundane by itself, but once I get a poem about my clothes and closet and sexuality around it, it'll fit. Because if there's a rainbow in my closet, and I am picking clothes to wear everyday from that rainbow, then I am coming out of the closet everyday. Or something to that extent. Ok. Stop laughing at me.
I am running to radioshack now and see if there's something to split a cable s that it can serve both computer and tv. Amanda will have to get one also if she brings her tv.
archive: 13 february: good mood
I don't know where the good mood came from but it needs to stay permanently, thank you very much.
I am cooking an asparagus and potato soup. Interesting sounding, and hopefully it is going to be good. After that I will cook the other two soups I have recipes and ingredients for.
I got my hair cut today. It feels great in the back, and the front is ok. The girl cut the bangs before I could say anything. I THOUGHT that I had made it clear to her that I was growing out the front, but she said, "Oh I didn't cut much, I only cut enough to give texture." Yeah.... she cut like half an inch or 3/4 inch. Its kinda much. But I still have hair swept to the side like I did it earlier today and yesterday.
I have drunk a Hornsby. Maybe that's part of my good mood. Maybe its Feist too.
Tomorrow is Valentine's. Wish it was falling on a weekend again so I can put on some kind of "anti-Valentines party" like I did down in Hattiesburg a few years ago. That was great. I had friends over, I made sushi, and we watched The Ring and Ringu (many of the people who came over were also in the Anime Club).
What could I show if I were to throw something together for tomorrow night?
Oh, and I went to Goodwill here in Berea! And I bought a bunch of shirts and sweaters! They all fit and look cute. Even the tiny Asian style top that I will probably only wear a couple times in the summer... maybe... if I go out... maybe... Its so FREAKING CUTE!
no... I don't sound gay, do I? hahaha...
I am in a good mood, damnit, so don't spoil it, cause its surprising that I am in this good of a mood when tomorrow's Valentine's and I don't have a lover to share it with... so fuck off!
I'm in a GOOD MOOD! hehehehe
I'm gonna go now and umm... hahaha... lol... no, I'm not, soup's on the stove.
*giggle*
I am cooking an asparagus and potato soup. Interesting sounding, and hopefully it is going to be good. After that I will cook the other two soups I have recipes and ingredients for.
I got my hair cut today. It feels great in the back, and the front is ok. The girl cut the bangs before I could say anything. I THOUGHT that I had made it clear to her that I was growing out the front, but she said, "Oh I didn't cut much, I only cut enough to give texture." Yeah.... she cut like half an inch or 3/4 inch. Its kinda much. But I still have hair swept to the side like I did it earlier today and yesterday.
I have drunk a Hornsby. Maybe that's part of my good mood. Maybe its Feist too.
Tomorrow is Valentine's. Wish it was falling on a weekend again so I can put on some kind of "anti-Valentines party" like I did down in Hattiesburg a few years ago. That was great. I had friends over, I made sushi, and we watched The Ring and Ringu (many of the people who came over were also in the Anime Club).
What could I show if I were to throw something together for tomorrow night?
Oh, and I went to Goodwill here in Berea! And I bought a bunch of shirts and sweaters! They all fit and look cute. Even the tiny Asian style top that I will probably only wear a couple times in the summer... maybe... if I go out... maybe... Its so FREAKING CUTE!
no... I don't sound gay, do I? hahaha...
I am in a good mood, damnit, so don't spoil it, cause its surprising that I am in this good of a mood when tomorrow's Valentine's and I don't have a lover to share it with... so fuck off!
I'm in a GOOD MOOD! hehehehe
I'm gonna go now and umm... hahaha... lol... no, I'm not, soup's on the stove.
*giggle*
Sunday, February 12, 2006
archive: 12 february 2006: tristan prettyman pics
Went to Louisville with friends Jo, Lisa, Jeff, and Billy.
Listened to Ben Taylor band perform... sounded pretty good and his sister is... umm... wow. EDIT: Um.... ya'll... I just read in the bio for Ben Taylor on his website... his father is James Taylor and his mother is Carly Simon... bigtime popular musicians, ya know? wow.
Then Tristan Prettyman came out on the stage with her friend Jen, who gave some beats to the songs.
And of course I took pics. This concert was the first I had really heard a lot of Tristan's music, but its impressive and I am glad I had a great time. Its better knowing that my friend Jo's face lit up in happy explosion when Tristan walked on stage. So... here's the pics I took for her... :)
http://public.fotki.com/blueathena/kentucky/louisville/tristan_prettyman/
Listened to Ben Taylor band perform... sounded pretty good and his sister is... umm... wow. EDIT: Um.... ya'll... I just read in the bio for Ben Taylor on his website... his father is James Taylor and his mother is Carly Simon... bigtime popular musicians, ya know? wow.
Then Tristan Prettyman came out on the stage with her friend Jen, who gave some beats to the songs.
And of course I took pics. This concert was the first I had really heard a lot of Tristan's music, but its impressive and I am glad I had a great time. Its better knowing that my friend Jo's face lit up in happy explosion when Tristan walked on stage. So... here's the pics I took for her... :)
http://public.fotki.com/blueathena/kentucky/louisville/tristan_prettyman/
Saturday, February 11, 2006
archive: 11 february 2006: snow, haircuts, messed up dreams
It is snowing like crazy out there.
I should go get cleaned up and ready for this brunch I am attending this morning at 10, and go ahead and walk around taking pictures.
Its going to be doing this all day, so why rush? hehe
Brunch includes poets Frank X. Walker, George Ella Lyon, and Tammy Horn. I'm glad Patty asked if I wanted her extra ticket. I am just walking down there to meet her, so maybe I will leave at 9:25. Ok, well, I guess that does mean I need to start getting ready... its 8:40 right now. *sigh*
After this brunch I think I am going to try to get my hair cut at Great Clips. I don't know what yet, maybe just a trim. It needs shaping anyway.
I need a real hat for this. haha. something warm
OH... I had a bad dream. It was weird. I dreamt about Alison. I dreamt that for some reason she was staying at my mom's house in MS. I was kinda excited by this cause I thought Alison would then get to know my family some. Then I decided to go home one weekend, and drove all that distance in one day. I get there. Alison's cut her hair and is no longer wearing it up. Its curly and falls to right about her chin. She looks so happy and this change was so freeing but I also knew something else had happened. It turned out she had a really big date for that night... She was running around getting dressed, nice long dress, very girly (doesn't seem like her) and the guy shows up. Dark hair and light blue eyes. He's wearing a royal blue button-down shirt, and he's tall, but not too tall.
Meanwhile I go outside to my car and I find it is stuck. The front driver's side tire is 3/4 way down into some mud. Ridiculously easy I lift it up out of the mud, carrying the car as if it is some cardboard cut-out and set in the courtyard. I saw also what dude was driving. I think his name was Jason or something close to that... Ja... Anyway... he's driving this huge, uncovered camoflaged patterned horsecart thing, very elaborate, but no horses... doesn't need them. They come outside and for some reason dude has to walk past me as I am lifting my car, and he looks at me and grins. I felt a surge of "WHAT THE FUCK is up with him" attitude. They leave.
I go back inside. It started snowing in the dream around the time I noticed my car was stuck.
Tell you I have weird dreams....
I should go get cleaned up and ready for this brunch I am attending this morning at 10, and go ahead and walk around taking pictures.
Its going to be doing this all day, so why rush? hehe
Brunch includes poets Frank X. Walker, George Ella Lyon, and Tammy Horn. I'm glad Patty asked if I wanted her extra ticket. I am just walking down there to meet her, so maybe I will leave at 9:25. Ok, well, I guess that does mean I need to start getting ready... its 8:40 right now. *sigh*
After this brunch I think I am going to try to get my hair cut at Great Clips. I don't know what yet, maybe just a trim. It needs shaping anyway.
I need a real hat for this. haha. something warm
OH... I had a bad dream. It was weird. I dreamt about Alison. I dreamt that for some reason she was staying at my mom's house in MS. I was kinda excited by this cause I thought Alison would then get to know my family some. Then I decided to go home one weekend, and drove all that distance in one day. I get there. Alison's cut her hair and is no longer wearing it up. Its curly and falls to right about her chin. She looks so happy and this change was so freeing but I also knew something else had happened. It turned out she had a really big date for that night... She was running around getting dressed, nice long dress, very girly (doesn't seem like her) and the guy shows up. Dark hair and light blue eyes. He's wearing a royal blue button-down shirt, and he's tall, but not too tall.
Meanwhile I go outside to my car and I find it is stuck. The front driver's side tire is 3/4 way down into some mud. Ridiculously easy I lift it up out of the mud, carrying the car as if it is some cardboard cut-out and set in the courtyard. I saw also what dude was driving. I think his name was Jason or something close to that... Ja... Anyway... he's driving this huge, uncovered camoflaged patterned horsecart thing, very elaborate, but no horses... doesn't need them. They come outside and for some reason dude has to walk past me as I am lifting my car, and he looks at me and grins. I felt a surge of "WHAT THE FUCK is up with him" attitude. They leave.
I go back inside. It started snowing in the dream around the time I noticed my car was stuck.
Tell you I have weird dreams....
archive: 11 february 2006: authors and road trips
I went to this brunch put on by AAUW (American Association of University Women) at Boone Tavern this morning. It was great. First Tammy Horn spoke about the book she just published and the future one she is working on about women beekeepers. She read some letters and the story of a woman who once worked in a factory but who ended up becoming editor of a magazine for beekeeping.
Then George Ella Lyon read some of her poems, and she read one which I loved and will have to do something similar, using a letter a grandmother wrote as a "found poem."
Then Frank X. Walker spoke and read several of his poems from Black Box, Buffalo Dance, and Affrilachia.
I bought a book from George Ella Lyon for my nephew, a children's book about a woman zoo keeper, and had it signed for him for his 5th birthday. :) I also bought Frank X. Walker's newest book and had him sign it, talked to him a little bit about writing poetry. I told him I am trying to write some poems about my grandmother since she has passed away and I spent so much time writing about my dad but none about her yet, and that I used his technique he referred to in class when he spoke with us. He also suggested finding a photo or two of her, candids. I sometimes never think of the obvious. heh. But the thing is, she hated having her picture taken and with good reason... As old and tired as she looked, she looked 10 year older in the pictures. Seriously. Oh well.. I will work on it.
I am going outside for about 20 minutes and take some pictures, then when I come in, get ready in about 20 minutes to head up to Lexington and meet Jo and the gang by 4... I should be there around 3:30-ish if I leave by 2:30 and don't have to stop for gas.
allright... later folks!
Then George Ella Lyon read some of her poems, and she read one which I loved and will have to do something similar, using a letter a grandmother wrote as a "found poem."
Then Frank X. Walker spoke and read several of his poems from Black Box, Buffalo Dance, and Affrilachia.
I bought a book from George Ella Lyon for my nephew, a children's book about a woman zoo keeper, and had it signed for him for his 5th birthday. :) I also bought Frank X. Walker's newest book and had him sign it, talked to him a little bit about writing poetry. I told him I am trying to write some poems about my grandmother since she has passed away and I spent so much time writing about my dad but none about her yet, and that I used his technique he referred to in class when he spoke with us. He also suggested finding a photo or two of her, candids. I sometimes never think of the obvious. heh. But the thing is, she hated having her picture taken and with good reason... As old and tired as she looked, she looked 10 year older in the pictures. Seriously. Oh well.. I will work on it.
I am going outside for about 20 minutes and take some pictures, then when I come in, get ready in about 20 minutes to head up to Lexington and meet Jo and the gang by 4... I should be there around 3:30-ish if I leave by 2:30 and don't have to stop for gas.
allright... later folks!
Thursday, February 9, 2006
archive: 9 february 2006: writing goals
I think tonight I am going to get my writing journal and sit down in Ground Effects and try writing, maybe listen to music. I wrote a list about my grandmother Monday evening when sitting in Live Wire. The list are all little visual memories of her, my interaction with her, things she said, etc. I am going to continue working on that list and then I will focus on one or two memories and expand them, create a poem.
Oddly enough, some of my best poetry comes from this technique. Doing this brings me back to the moment of the past, and what I remember feeling, seeing, hearing, and sometimes the tiny details. Of course it is all coated with the present and with hindsight, but that is usually the point. How does the past affect the present? And how does the present affect my perception of the past?
I haven't written any poems about my grandmother, and since she died in November 2004, I haven't really dedicated any time to honoring her in any way. I have been dealing with my father's death (same year, March) and writing about my relationship with him, disappointment, and difference.
I should actively write a series of poems about family and relationships, mine in particular, of course. It could be a personal collection to give to the family I still have.
I could do the same about friends, too. I tried to do that once my senior year, writing poems in sonnet form (not style, mind you) about two specific friends, Jessica and Jordan... but then when I tried to write anyone else's it just didn't work. Actually, those two didn't really work either. Sonnet is so limiting. Those two poems are in year 1996, Jessica and Jordan.
EDIT: I just realized, OMG, that was TEN YEARS AGO!
ok. Back to work, although it is almost lunch time. woo!
OH... and both my alarms did not go off this morning, and I woke at 9, got to work at 9:30. That sucked. Its all because I stayed up till about 3 a.m. watching the "movie" and thinking about it a lot.
I AM going to go write tonight. I am also going to take those two BIG boxes of things to Goodwill. So much, so much to do!
Oddly enough, some of my best poetry comes from this technique. Doing this brings me back to the moment of the past, and what I remember feeling, seeing, hearing, and sometimes the tiny details. Of course it is all coated with the present and with hindsight, but that is usually the point. How does the past affect the present? And how does the present affect my perception of the past?
I haven't written any poems about my grandmother, and since she died in November 2004, I haven't really dedicated any time to honoring her in any way. I have been dealing with my father's death (same year, March) and writing about my relationship with him, disappointment, and difference.
I should actively write a series of poems about family and relationships, mine in particular, of course. It could be a personal collection to give to the family I still have.
I could do the same about friends, too. I tried to do that once my senior year, writing poems in sonnet form (not style, mind you) about two specific friends, Jessica and Jordan... but then when I tried to write anyone else's it just didn't work. Actually, those two didn't really work either. Sonnet is so limiting. Those two poems are in year 1996, Jessica and Jordan.
EDIT: I just realized, OMG, that was TEN YEARS AGO!
ok. Back to work, although it is almost lunch time. woo!
OH... and both my alarms did not go off this morning, and I woke at 9, got to work at 9:30. That sucked. Its all because I stayed up till about 3 a.m. watching the "movie" and thinking about it a lot.
I AM going to go write tonight. I am also going to take those two BIG boxes of things to Goodwill. So much, so much to do!
Tuesday, February 7, 2006
archive: food and text msgs
Didn't go to Mia's for karaoke (maybe next week). I went to the photographer's club meeting though, and listened to the guy talk about and show all these flowers and plants in KY. Some I noted so that I might find them and take pics myself. Oh, these are rare flowering plants indigenous to KY. allright, that makes it a little more interesting.
I finally ate something of substance for dinner at 1:30 a.m. And I bought Hornsbys before I left Richmond and I drank one of those in about 5 minutes. I miss how those taste, but I wish they were stronger. 5.5% alcohol? haha ok, whatever, nevermind.
I'm going to sleep now. Tomorrow night I am doing laundry! Oh the excitement! haha
Someone text message me sometimes. I like text messages. They're fun. They keep me entertained and feeling loved by friends, heehee.
I finally ate something of substance for dinner at 1:30 a.m. And I bought Hornsbys before I left Richmond and I drank one of those in about 5 minutes. I miss how those taste, but I wish they were stronger. 5.5% alcohol? haha ok, whatever, nevermind.
I'm going to sleep now. Tomorrow night I am doing laundry! Oh the excitement! haha
Someone text message me sometimes. I like text messages. They're fun. They keep me entertained and feeling loved by friends, heehee.
archive: 7 february 2006: happiness in a used towel
Laundry tonight. Too bad I don't have a washer and dryer in this place. I have to go clear across town to the laundrymat and spend about $5-10 on getting my laundry done. Oh joy! I have a lot to do. And then again at the end of next week, for the blankets and pillow cases on the guest bed before Amanda moves in.
back to work I go. oh joy joy joy
back to work I go. oh joy joy joy
Monday, February 6, 2006
archive: 6 february 2006: full-circle info, get-togethers and music
It is interesting how things come back to you, full-circle. Not physical, but intellectual. So, this actress Ann-Marie MacDonald has cameos in The L Word this season. The first time I saw her face I thought I recognized her, but I forgot to follow through and find the missing piece. Turns out, she is exactly who I thought she is: She played Frances in Better Than Chocolate. So I decide that I want to look further, see what else she has done. I discover she is a writer and playwrite. And yes, it just so happens that I have seen a production of her play, Goodnight Desdemona (Good Morning Juliet) when I was in college at The University of Mississippi. I knew a lot of the people in the theatre department, especially Michelle, who was my RA and who was in the play. I remember it being a good play, though I don't remember what it is about. So this is an interesting tidbit of trivia. Oh, and she's in her late 40s, married to her partner, Alisa Palmer, and they have adopted a little girl. wow. Of course, they live in Canada, where all this is possible.
Tonight was fabulous. I had friends over, much food was eaten and enjoyed and praised, and we watched the last bit of the Superbowl. haha. My dad has been honored. hehe. And then we watched The L Word, which was emotionally-packed, along with enough sex to compensate for the lack of it in the previous episodes this season. So happy to see Lisa, Rachel, Marissa, Tina, James, Seth, and a new friend, Matt. I get all too hyper when I get to have people over.
Next weekend is going to be busy, something to do every night. Alanna is playing at Live Wire in Richmond, and I want to go hear her. Saturday I am going to Louisville with friends (Jo, Lisa, Jeff) to hear Tristan Prettyman perform. Sunday is the usual L Word get-together. I am going to be estactic all weekend. hehe...
Bedtime now... work at 8 a.m. comes way too soon. Must stop this mild insomniac behavior.
Tonight was fabulous. I had friends over, much food was eaten and enjoyed and praised, and we watched the last bit of the Superbowl. haha. My dad has been honored. hehe. And then we watched The L Word, which was emotionally-packed, along with enough sex to compensate for the lack of it in the previous episodes this season. So happy to see Lisa, Rachel, Marissa, Tina, James, Seth, and a new friend, Matt. I get all too hyper when I get to have people over.
Next weekend is going to be busy, something to do every night. Alanna is playing at Live Wire in Richmond, and I want to go hear her. Saturday I am going to Louisville with friends (Jo, Lisa, Jeff) to hear Tristan Prettyman perform. Sunday is the usual L Word get-together. I am going to be estactic all weekend. hehe...
Bedtime now... work at 8 a.m. comes way too soon. Must stop this mild insomniac behavior.
Sunday, February 5, 2006
archive: 5 february 2006: sunday
I cooked three soups this evening: a corn chowder, a bean soup, and a chicken and rice soup. I have three more recipes, but I am out of containers and I need more onions... didn't realize I didn't have enough onions for them.
I was going to make the pesto today, but it might as well be best to make it tomorrow anyway. I have an idea in my head, but no recipe, for what I will cook tomorrow. I will see if I can find something with precise instructions to fit my idea.
It snowed today and I never drove anywhere. I only walked to the garbage bin behind the Mexican resturant to throw away some old empty cat litter containers! At least the closet is cleaned out. Things look better.
What time should people come tomorrow? Umm... is 8:00-8:30 too late? I figure that gives time to eat and chatter, clear away plates, and then watch the most recent episode of The L Word. Really, people can come over at any time, as I will be cooking, but if you come after 8:30, don't blame me for it getting cool and needing to be heated up in the microwave!
I have been a total recluse today. I just realized, I have not spoken to anyone today. I have not interacted with anyone today. weird....
But now, I shall sleep.
oh... and this is weird, and not directed at anyone, but I have really had the impulse to want to say "i love you" to someone today, though... I don't have anyone to say that to, so the fact of the impulse is very disconcerting. Its loneliness and wanting to have the feeling of being needed. so, bah... *sigh*
I was going to make the pesto today, but it might as well be best to make it tomorrow anyway. I have an idea in my head, but no recipe, for what I will cook tomorrow. I will see if I can find something with precise instructions to fit my idea.
It snowed today and I never drove anywhere. I only walked to the garbage bin behind the Mexican resturant to throw away some old empty cat litter containers! At least the closet is cleaned out. Things look better.
What time should people come tomorrow? Umm... is 8:00-8:30 too late? I figure that gives time to eat and chatter, clear away plates, and then watch the most recent episode of The L Word. Really, people can come over at any time, as I will be cooking, but if you come after 8:30, don't blame me for it getting cool and needing to be heated up in the microwave!
I have been a total recluse today. I just realized, I have not spoken to anyone today. I have not interacted with anyone today. weird....
But now, I shall sleep.
oh... and this is weird, and not directed at anyone, but I have really had the impulse to want to say "i love you" to someone today, though... I don't have anyone to say that to, so the fact of the impulse is very disconcerting. Its loneliness and wanting to have the feeling of being needed. so, bah... *sigh*
Thursday, February 2, 2006
archive: 2 february 2006: in-house
I'm not going out any this weekend. I thought about going out Saturday, but I really don't need to. I should get a lot of stuff around the house...
and with job searching stuff...
and with archivist certification stuff...
and with cooking soups for lunch and dinner...
I really need ink in my printer again, but that's like $50.
I am going to have to find whatever will make it possible to split my cable to both TV and computer from the same cable cord. Probably a little box. Amanda is going to move in, and that'll probably be next week/weekend. I am going to move the computer and its table into the "dining room" area and clean up the guest room and closet.
I also need to go through all my books and decide what to give to the college library, what to give to the public library, and what to give to the bookstore (maybe get some cash for it).
See, a lot of stuff to do this weekend.
Anybody can come stop by any time. Just don't expect me to look great, especially if I am cleaning, sweeping, mopping, scrubbing... hehehe Its going to be hardcore. Yeah, Hardcore Spring Cleaning. It is almost Spring, even if the weather is in denial.
and with job searching stuff...
and with archivist certification stuff...
and with cooking soups for lunch and dinner...
I really need ink in my printer again, but that's like $50.
I am going to have to find whatever will make it possible to split my cable to both TV and computer from the same cable cord. Probably a little box. Amanda is going to move in, and that'll probably be next week/weekend. I am going to move the computer and its table into the "dining room" area and clean up the guest room and closet.
I also need to go through all my books and decide what to give to the college library, what to give to the public library, and what to give to the bookstore (maybe get some cash for it).
See, a lot of stuff to do this weekend.
Anybody can come stop by any time. Just don't expect me to look great, especially if I am cleaning, sweeping, mopping, scrubbing... hehehe Its going to be hardcore. Yeah, Hardcore Spring Cleaning. It is almost Spring, even if the weather is in denial.
Tuesday, January 31, 2006
archive: 31 january 2006: lexington trip tonight
I am going to Lexington tonight right after work to go get my pictures from Common Grounds. Hopefully they will be there this time, since Jim was supposed to bring them back there on Sunday. I couldn't come Sunday (lack of gas and money), but now I can.
I am going to look in a phonebook and see about setting up a hair appointment. Doubt I can set it for today, but I imagine it'll work for sometime this week-evening or weekend. Guess we'll see. I also just want to know the average cost.
I am going to look in a phonebook and see about setting up a hair appointment. Doubt I can set it for today, but I imagine it'll work for sometime this week-evening or weekend. Guess we'll see. I also just want to know the average cost.
Sunday, January 29, 2006
archive: 29 january 2006: locked out
I just got accidentally locked out of my house, and then the GREATEST friends ever helped break into my house by removing the ridiculous window unit A/C (which was too loud and didn't cool the entire duplex so I never used it) from the window and crawling in and opening the door.
Yes... I have a spare key, and if Amanda moves in she'll get that spare and I will need to get another spare to place outside my house somewhere so if ever the door gets shut while I am standing outside without my keys, I won't get locked out of my house. hehehe
I am so not mad or agitated or anything. It was amazing and hilarious and terrific. Thanks to Seth, Marissa, James, Tina, Lisa, and Rachel... you all rock.
Next Sunday I intend to make dinner, but I don't know what yet. I know that it will have vegan options, so it's going to take the week to plan it. But it shall be fun.
The greatest thing about the A/C unit being removed is that there no longer will be a draft coming from that window. Horrible draft from that window 'cause of the window unit.
hehe... I so wish I had had my camera with me, but if I had had my camera with me, I might would have had my keys in my back pocket (kinda out of habit I probably would have grabbed both from the purse) and the whole thing wouldn't have happened. lol... but its ok. People are fascinating.
(((hugs to all of you)))
Yes... I have a spare key, and if Amanda moves in she'll get that spare and I will need to get another spare to place outside my house somewhere so if ever the door gets shut while I am standing outside without my keys, I won't get locked out of my house. hehehe
I am so not mad or agitated or anything. It was amazing and hilarious and terrific. Thanks to Seth, Marissa, James, Tina, Lisa, and Rachel... you all rock.
Next Sunday I intend to make dinner, but I don't know what yet. I know that it will have vegan options, so it's going to take the week to plan it. But it shall be fun.
The greatest thing about the A/C unit being removed is that there no longer will be a draft coming from that window. Horrible draft from that window 'cause of the window unit.
hehe... I so wish I had had my camera with me, but if I had had my camera with me, I might would have had my keys in my back pocket (kinda out of habit I probably would have grabbed both from the purse) and the whole thing wouldn't have happened. lol... but its ok. People are fascinating.
(((hugs to all of you)))
Wednesday, January 25, 2006
archive: 25 january 2006: bleh
Moody tonight. Restless and want to go do something but not really able to. Going to this weekend though, so that's cool. Been watching episodes of "Six Feet Under" tonight, continuously, and though the show is great, I am bored outta my mind. heh.
Restless, and all day had pangs of wanting to cry for absolutely no reason at all, but of course, didn't. Not intensely, just... mildly. I'm just tired, and a little stressed with this job and its deadline and everything to follow...
Uncertainty leaves me unsettled, nerve-wracked, restless and worrisome. I wish there was some certainty, other than the daily 8-5 job I have.
Restless, and all day had pangs of wanting to cry for absolutely no reason at all, but of course, didn't. Not intensely, just... mildly. I'm just tired, and a little stressed with this job and its deadline and everything to follow...
Uncertainty leaves me unsettled, nerve-wracked, restless and worrisome. I wish there was some certainty, other than the daily 8-5 job I have.
Monday, January 23, 2006
archive: 23 january 2006: music biography
I am creating a music biography.
I am working with each year, from birth to present. I am using a website which lists the top 30 songs for each year to help me get started. I am going to use amazon.com to preview listening to songs to figure out if I have ever heard some of these songs. I love the 70s... I have copied the ones for 1976 through 1979. Queen was all over those charts those years, and Bee Gees, too. Simon and Garfunkel too. Yes! :)
Then I will go back for some and connect some movies to certain years. I know I probably heard My Sharona and liked it when I watched the movie "Beaches." I liked Bette Milder at that time too, and then again when I was a freshman in college and dating Mark (he liked her music too). I know some stuff I won't recall. I know some things I won't know where to put them. I remember so clearly listening to Tool's song "Sweat" in 9th grade, but the dates don't match. What's up with that? And there's several years where the music everyone else was listening to I didn't get into until a few years later 'cause at the time I was listening to cassettes or CDs instead of the radio. Its complicated, but for the most part, much of 11th and 12th grade I ignored the radio. Kurt Cobain? I didn't know he killed himself until months later, when I caught up with everyone else my age and listening to Nirvana after the fact. At the time I had been playing The Doors and Morrissey nonstop. hehe... yes, interesting combination, I know.
ok... back to the compiling. Oh, what triggered my work on this tonight? A Big Hair Metal Music compilation commerical... Mr. Big, Warrant, Trixter, Guns n Roses, Great White, Skid Row, Saigon Kick, Ratt, White Lion, Bret Michaels, Scorpions... yeah. I want a soundtrack to my life, a REAL one. :)
This is going to take some time, imagination, memories, thought, and work.
I am working with each year, from birth to present. I am using a website which lists the top 30 songs for each year to help me get started. I am going to use amazon.com to preview listening to songs to figure out if I have ever heard some of these songs. I love the 70s... I have copied the ones for 1976 through 1979. Queen was all over those charts those years, and Bee Gees, too. Simon and Garfunkel too. Yes! :)
Then I will go back for some and connect some movies to certain years. I know I probably heard My Sharona and liked it when I watched the movie "Beaches." I liked Bette Milder at that time too, and then again when I was a freshman in college and dating Mark (he liked her music too). I know some stuff I won't recall. I know some things I won't know where to put them. I remember so clearly listening to Tool's song "Sweat" in 9th grade, but the dates don't match. What's up with that? And there's several years where the music everyone else was listening to I didn't get into until a few years later 'cause at the time I was listening to cassettes or CDs instead of the radio. Its complicated, but for the most part, much of 11th and 12th grade I ignored the radio. Kurt Cobain? I didn't know he killed himself until months later, when I caught up with everyone else my age and listening to Nirvana after the fact. At the time I had been playing The Doors and Morrissey nonstop. hehe... yes, interesting combination, I know.
ok... back to the compiling. Oh, what triggered my work on this tonight? A Big Hair Metal Music compilation commerical... Mr. Big, Warrant, Trixter, Guns n Roses, Great White, Skid Row, Saigon Kick, Ratt, White Lion, Bret Michaels, Scorpions... yeah. I want a soundtrack to my life, a REAL one. :)
This is going to take some time, imagination, memories, thought, and work.
Thursday, January 19, 2006
archive: 19 janaury 2006: job search
I was looking at some job postings that I printed at work today. These are ones I know I can't apply for because they are looking to fill these positions within the next month or sooner, not after August.
I just got through reading one I would definitely apply for if it were July already. It is an archivist position at Columbia University, in yes, NYC. Its the Center for Human Rights Documentation and Research, Rare Book and Manuscript Library. Oh how I would LOVE to work there, just by that name. HUMAN RIGHTS. Benefits included tuition exemption and assistance in university housing. Yes. That's the sort of things I love. Well, nonetheless, I am about to go to the University's website, find their human resources job postings site, and bookmark it. :)
Just wanted to shout out. This stuff is going to be hard, but this one gave me hope. Oh, the job? The work would have been very similar to what I am doing now, with a little bit more responsibility. A few things I would need to know, like creating databases, creating spreadsheets, maintaining statistics... but I can learn those things.
I just got through reading one I would definitely apply for if it were July already. It is an archivist position at Columbia University, in yes, NYC. Its the Center for Human Rights Documentation and Research, Rare Book and Manuscript Library. Oh how I would LOVE to work there, just by that name. HUMAN RIGHTS. Benefits included tuition exemption and assistance in university housing. Yes. That's the sort of things I love. Well, nonetheless, I am about to go to the University's website, find their human resources job postings site, and bookmark it. :)
Just wanted to shout out. This stuff is going to be hard, but this one gave me hope. Oh, the job? The work would have been very similar to what I am doing now, with a little bit more responsibility. A few things I would need to know, like creating databases, creating spreadsheets, maintaining statistics... but I can learn those things.
Tuesday, January 17, 2006
archive: 17 january 2006: mia's monday
Went to Mia's tonight, had a good time, and I sang karaoke - "Come to My Window." Next time I will do some other song, but that was one I knew I could do no matter what. Jo and Tonya came up and were my backup singers. hehe I took a few pictures, just for giggles. I had a good time.
Now, bedtime. Its nearly 2:30 a.m. Work at 8 a.m. for me. Shew! lol...
Now, bedtime. Its nearly 2:30 a.m. Work at 8 a.m. for me. Shew! lol...
Monday, January 16, 2006
archive: 16 january 2006: insomnia
I think drinking that doubleshot of espresso drink around 8:15 tonight has kept me up all night. Plus the whole The L Word excitement, people coming over to watch it (Lisa, Seth, Marissa, James, Brice, and me)... and changing up my whole friendspace section and adding three picture slideshows.
Going to sleep now... THANK YOU, I don't have to be at work till 3, so I imagine I will sleep most of the day away. Oh well, but this will be allright.
Going to sleep now... THANK YOU, I don't have to be at work till 3, so I imagine I will sleep most of the day away. Oh well, but this will be allright.
Saturday, January 14, 2006
archive: 14 january 2006: snow
I am such a goofball. I knew that it was supposed to snow sometime last night, and for all I know, it might have snowed when I was still awake but I didn't look out and see until this morning and everything is covered in a white blanket. Its pretty. And messy.
I have to find my camera battery charger. I need to get cleaned up, get stuff ready for laundry, eat, go outside and take pictures, then call Krista and let her know I am coming to do my laundry. I did tell her 1, since I figured that would be a time where I wouldn't be waking her up or really keeping her from going out somewhere or something. heh.
SNOW! I know you Kentucky people are like, "its not that much, its nothing" but any amount of snow makes me smile.
I have to find my camera battery charger. I need to get cleaned up, get stuff ready for laundry, eat, go outside and take pictures, then call Krista and let her know I am coming to do my laundry. I did tell her 1, since I figured that would be a time where I wouldn't be waking her up or really keeping her from going out somewhere or something. heh.
SNOW! I know you Kentucky people are like, "its not that much, its nothing" but any amount of snow makes me smile.
Monday, January 9, 2006
archive: 9 january 2006: money stress
Well, it looks like I won't be able to do ANYTHING for the rest of this month. I'm going to have a couple of checks bounce probably by the end of this week and there is absolutely nothing I can do about it. Tried to do one of those cash advance things but they can't loan money but for 14 days at a time, and... my paycheck comes on the 31st, not in 14 days. shit shit shit.
So... don't mind me if I disappear for a while. It's cause my broke ass can't afford to go anywhere. January can suck my big toe.
So... don't mind me if I disappear for a while. It's cause my broke ass can't afford to go anywhere. January can suck my big toe.
Tuesday, January 3, 2006
archive: 3 january 2006: health
I went to a doctor way back in college when I was sick with the flu. I had this swollen bump between my clavicle and shoulder, under the skin. Doctor said it was nothing to worry about, just that some lymph nodes swelled up and didn't go down and created something like a benign little ball. Doctor said I could have surgery to remove it, but it would be expensive and since I didn't have health insurance and there was no worries about it, I didn't have it removed. But she did say that if ever it swells up, becomes hard, doesn't move when I push on it with my finger, then I should go see a doctor about it. Well, its been a while since I have felt it, so I cannot remember if it is the same size or not. It seems to me that it has swollen just a little bit, but all those other things aren't taking place. I think sometime this week I will make an appointment to have it looked at and told what my options are on removal.
Plus, I need to call to get a yearly exam anyway. Might as well get the whole body checked out. geeze.
Plus, I need to call to get a yearly exam anyway. Might as well get the whole body checked out. geeze.
Monday, January 2, 2006
archive: 2 january 2006: summary of 2005
I usually try to do this on the 1st day of the new year, but it took me forever and so it is officially being posted on the 2nd day, but whatever...
Summary of 2005
January
Drove back to Kentucky on New Year's Day and there was very little traffic on the highways. Began dating Becky. Had several sexual firsts, all good, on the 14th and 15th . Met Becky's friends Bev and Kelly. Was experiencing my first Winter in Kentucky with more snow for longer than I ever experienced in Mississippi (even that snowy Winter in Oxford, MS). Tied a very memorable moment to Melissa Ferrick's song "Drive." Also received first outrageous gas bill.
February
I made a special dinner for Becky on the 1st. On the 5th I went to Keeneland Racecourse and took pictures of the empty racetracks. Becky and I almost broke up because I considered myself bisexual and she had doubts of the seriousness of the relationship. I reassured her that to me the relationship was not temporary, and that I wasn't going to leave her for a guy. A few days before Valentine's Day I called Mom and came out to her as bisexual. Also began watching second season of The L Word on Showtime. Began staying in Lexington every weekend at Becky's.
March
Becky and I had several ups and downs, but generally okay. I worked through Spring Break. Episode when I got really sick-drunk, came back to her apartment, and she couldn't cope with it and was playing a CD really loud in the stereo until I came in turned it off, and said I just needed her to lay with me and to go to sleep.
April
Went home to Mississippi on the last day of March. Visited with Natalie, Arrie, and Keit. Came back from Mississippi. Becky cut my hair really short Monday on the 4th. We broke up that same night when I mentioned that Sarah McLachlan's song "I Will Remember You" made me think of her. Breakup spread out over the entire first week of April to the 8th. On the 9th I went to Keeneland Racecourse and took pictures of my first horse race. I also bet on two races, but lost on both accounts. I met up with LeTonia, Carol, and Karen one evening at Mia's and then went with them to talk to Betty and Alice at their apartment. Evening ended with us leaving after Betty started getting mean drunk. It was awkward. I began hiking a lot more this month to preoccupy my mind and body: Berea's East and West Pinnacles, Anglin Falls. Also, bought my new bed, and moved my old bed into the guest room.
May
Met with Central Kentucky Camera Club in Lexington to take pics at Tom Barnes' garden. Lovely flower pictures. Also spent most of a very cold night in Richmond's downtown square taking nighttime pictures of lights and storefront window reflections. Love those pictures. Attended my first Berea Art Hop. More photography in Lexington's cemeteries with springtime flowers. Went to Mayfest in Lexington, and the Berea Art Fair in Berea. Hiked Anglin Falls again and took more small town cemetery pictures. Also found Climax Falls and took pictures. Hiked in Natural Bridge State Park (KY) on the last day of the month.
June
I went to Raven's Run on a somewhat drizzly day and took pics of the Kentucky River, then took more pictures in Richmond. More flower and cemetery photography happenings. On June 22nd I saw Melissa Ferrick perform at The Dame for the first time. On June 24th I met Rachel in Cincinnati and we drove up to Columbus to see Melissa Ferrick there, plus other female fronted bands at Columbus' Gay Pride Festival. On the 25th I drove around Cincy and took pics on the Ludlow and Northside districts. Also worked with Brittney and Amanda in Special Collections (they only worked for the summer). We begin eating out at Main Street Cafe and the Mexican Restaurant through the summer months.
July
Went to Red River Gorge and took some pictures, and visited Gladie and took pics of an old house there. Met Jo, a new friend made through Myspace. Met Lisa and Billy and went with them and Jo to Cumberland Falls (of course, I took pics). I have pictures on display in the Barnes and Noble cafe.
August
Lisa and I drove to Dayton, OH, to see Melissa Ferrick perform there. Also heard Katie Tood perform (I took pics). I went home mid-month and met with Allison. She gave me the Eudora Welty biography, signed by Suzanne Marrs. I went with friends to Lake Charles, LA, for the annual trip. This was the last time we'll see the Breaux's lakehouse as it was then. I get to put pictures up in Mia's on the 22nd. Jo and I sing "Come to My Window" on karaoke night. I hike up the Pinnacles a couple more times. I begin sitting in on a poetry class at Berea College, and I write several poems about my dad, my sexuality, and past relationship.
September
I drove around a lot to small towns and took pictures of their downtown areas and courthouses: Georgetown, Midway, Versailles. Berea has its 150th Celebration in the quad, along with a big sand sculpture and huge cake. Jo, Lisa, and I go to Jacob's in Cincinnati. Georgetown Cemetery pictures. Jo and I take a trip to Louisville to see Melissa Ferrick perform, with opening act Natalia Zuckerman. I have a picture taken with Melissa and Jo, and a signed setlist. Jo and I hike the East Pinnacle. Lisa, Billy, Jeff, Jo, and I go to Club Liquid together.
October
On the 1st I take pics in Louisville of the many heads by the Ohio River. On the 3rd I see Becky's mother's paintings in Mia's the same time my photos are on the walls. I take my first pictures out at Owsley Fork, followed by more visits for sunset shots. Jo and I go to the Dame to see Amy Ray perform, with opening act Capital B (Bitch from Bitch and Animal). We have a great time, but I also saw Becky there that night. Mountain Day and I hike to the West Pinnacle. I begin participating in ACE League activities and help with the Coming Out Dance. Met Marissa, Stephanie, Daniel, and Shae that night, friends of Amanda's. Lisa, Jo, Emily, and I go to Covington for Halloween and clubbing at the Yadda Club.
November
I go to Louisville to meet my cousin who comes to Kentucky by way of a nursing-related convention. We go out both Friday and Saturday night and have a great time. Went home for Thanksgiving. Saw Walk the Line with my sister in Memphis. Visited with Allison, her parents and sister, and watched a movie with her at her place. Had the annual sushi Thanksgiving with friends at Little Tokyo.
December
On the 2nd I go to a little party get-together in Amanda's honor at Daniel and Stephanie's place. I stay awake all night and leave at 5:30. Jo, Lisa, and I go to The Bar and have a fantabulous time on the 3rd. Annual Hutchins Library Christmas party on the 6th. I rented a vehicle (ended up being a Silverado) and drove to Cleveland, OH, for the U2 concert. I stayed in a hotel which had some historical/cultural connections. Had wonderful time at the concert, went out to The Harp for a little while, then went to Bounce for dancing a little while before going to bed. Went out with Jo and Lisa at Mia's for karaoke night (spin-the-bottle instead) before I left town Wednesday. Had Christmas at my sister's house in Memphis. Took my nephew to the Children's Museum and had fun with him. Went home to Jackson and spent time with my cousin. Took pictures of Hotel King Edward (before it gets torn down). For New Year's Eve went to Josh's get-together in Lexington and stayed till after midnight then went to The Bar. Had good fun and only drank rum.
Summary of 2005
January
Drove back to Kentucky on New Year's Day and there was very little traffic on the highways. Began dating Becky. Had several sexual firsts, all good, on the 14th and 15th . Met Becky's friends Bev and Kelly. Was experiencing my first Winter in Kentucky with more snow for longer than I ever experienced in Mississippi (even that snowy Winter in Oxford, MS). Tied a very memorable moment to Melissa Ferrick's song "Drive." Also received first outrageous gas bill.
February
I made a special dinner for Becky on the 1st. On the 5th I went to Keeneland Racecourse and took pictures of the empty racetracks. Becky and I almost broke up because I considered myself bisexual and she had doubts of the seriousness of the relationship. I reassured her that to me the relationship was not temporary, and that I wasn't going to leave her for a guy. A few days before Valentine's Day I called Mom and came out to her as bisexual. Also began watching second season of The L Word on Showtime. Began staying in Lexington every weekend at Becky's.
March
Becky and I had several ups and downs, but generally okay. I worked through Spring Break. Episode when I got really sick-drunk, came back to her apartment, and she couldn't cope with it and was playing a CD really loud in the stereo until I came in turned it off, and said I just needed her to lay with me and to go to sleep.
April
Went home to Mississippi on the last day of March. Visited with Natalie, Arrie, and Keit. Came back from Mississippi. Becky cut my hair really short Monday on the 4th. We broke up that same night when I mentioned that Sarah McLachlan's song "I Will Remember You" made me think of her. Breakup spread out over the entire first week of April to the 8th. On the 9th I went to Keeneland Racecourse and took pictures of my first horse race. I also bet on two races, but lost on both accounts. I met up with LeTonia, Carol, and Karen one evening at Mia's and then went with them to talk to Betty and Alice at their apartment. Evening ended with us leaving after Betty started getting mean drunk. It was awkward. I began hiking a lot more this month to preoccupy my mind and body: Berea's East and West Pinnacles, Anglin Falls. Also, bought my new bed, and moved my old bed into the guest room.
May
Met with Central Kentucky Camera Club in Lexington to take pics at Tom Barnes' garden. Lovely flower pictures. Also spent most of a very cold night in Richmond's downtown square taking nighttime pictures of lights and storefront window reflections. Love those pictures. Attended my first Berea Art Hop. More photography in Lexington's cemeteries with springtime flowers. Went to Mayfest in Lexington, and the Berea Art Fair in Berea. Hiked Anglin Falls again and took more small town cemetery pictures. Also found Climax Falls and took pictures. Hiked in Natural Bridge State Park (KY) on the last day of the month.
June
I went to Raven's Run on a somewhat drizzly day and took pics of the Kentucky River, then took more pictures in Richmond. More flower and cemetery photography happenings. On June 22nd I saw Melissa Ferrick perform at The Dame for the first time. On June 24th I met Rachel in Cincinnati and we drove up to Columbus to see Melissa Ferrick there, plus other female fronted bands at Columbus' Gay Pride Festival. On the 25th I drove around Cincy and took pics on the Ludlow and Northside districts. Also worked with Brittney and Amanda in Special Collections (they only worked for the summer). We begin eating out at Main Street Cafe and the Mexican Restaurant through the summer months.
July
Went to Red River Gorge and took some pictures, and visited Gladie and took pics of an old house there. Met Jo, a new friend made through Myspace. Met Lisa and Billy and went with them and Jo to Cumberland Falls (of course, I took pics). I have pictures on display in the Barnes and Noble cafe.
August
Lisa and I drove to Dayton, OH, to see Melissa Ferrick perform there. Also heard Katie Tood perform (I took pics). I went home mid-month and met with Allison. She gave me the Eudora Welty biography, signed by Suzanne Marrs. I went with friends to Lake Charles, LA, for the annual trip. This was the last time we'll see the Breaux's lakehouse as it was then. I get to put pictures up in Mia's on the 22nd. Jo and I sing "Come to My Window" on karaoke night. I hike up the Pinnacles a couple more times. I begin sitting in on a poetry class at Berea College, and I write several poems about my dad, my sexuality, and past relationship.
September
I drove around a lot to small towns and took pictures of their downtown areas and courthouses: Georgetown, Midway, Versailles. Berea has its 150th Celebration in the quad, along with a big sand sculpture and huge cake. Jo, Lisa, and I go to Jacob's in Cincinnati. Georgetown Cemetery pictures. Jo and I take a trip to Louisville to see Melissa Ferrick perform, with opening act Natalia Zuckerman. I have a picture taken with Melissa and Jo, and a signed setlist. Jo and I hike the East Pinnacle. Lisa, Billy, Jeff, Jo, and I go to Club Liquid together.
October
On the 1st I take pics in Louisville of the many heads by the Ohio River. On the 3rd I see Becky's mother's paintings in Mia's the same time my photos are on the walls. I take my first pictures out at Owsley Fork, followed by more visits for sunset shots. Jo and I go to the Dame to see Amy Ray perform, with opening act Capital B (Bitch from Bitch and Animal). We have a great time, but I also saw Becky there that night. Mountain Day and I hike to the West Pinnacle. I begin participating in ACE League activities and help with the Coming Out Dance. Met Marissa, Stephanie, Daniel, and Shae that night, friends of Amanda's. Lisa, Jo, Emily, and I go to Covington for Halloween and clubbing at the Yadda Club.
November
I go to Louisville to meet my cousin who comes to Kentucky by way of a nursing-related convention. We go out both Friday and Saturday night and have a great time. Went home for Thanksgiving. Saw Walk the Line with my sister in Memphis. Visited with Allison, her parents and sister, and watched a movie with her at her place. Had the annual sushi Thanksgiving with friends at Little Tokyo.
December
On the 2nd I go to a little party get-together in Amanda's honor at Daniel and Stephanie's place. I stay awake all night and leave at 5:30. Jo, Lisa, and I go to The Bar and have a fantabulous time on the 3rd. Annual Hutchins Library Christmas party on the 6th. I rented a vehicle (ended up being a Silverado) and drove to Cleveland, OH, for the U2 concert. I stayed in a hotel which had some historical/cultural connections. Had wonderful time at the concert, went out to The Harp for a little while, then went to Bounce for dancing a little while before going to bed. Went out with Jo and Lisa at Mia's for karaoke night (spin-the-bottle instead) before I left town Wednesday. Had Christmas at my sister's house in Memphis. Took my nephew to the Children's Museum and had fun with him. Went home to Jackson and spent time with my cousin. Took pictures of Hotel King Edward (before it gets torn down). For New Year's Eve went to Josh's get-together in Lexington and stayed till after midnight then went to The Bar. Had good fun and only drank rum.
Sunday, January 1, 2006
archive: 1 january 2006: sleeping in is good
Happy New Year!
I was up till 6 a.m. this morning, and I slept till 12:30 p.m. today. Felt good, but now I have a lot of stuff to do...
I am supposed to have some pictures on display in the Berea College library for January, but I don't have the money to go and get enlargements and big frames, so I am going to be lame and just put up the 8x10s I have. I'll pick... 15 or 20 of them to put up. I feel lame about it, but I can't help I can't afford it.
Yesterday my plan was that I would go into my computer and pick out 10 pics that would work well enlarged to 13x15 (or something like that), put them on a CD, go to Meijer's, print them off there, and get frames there, but... that'll run about $100 altogether, I think. I really can't spare that 'cause of bills and whatnot. The $300-400 I have has to last me through the end of January, and really it may not even be that much.
No more driving around everywhere and stuff for this month.
I want to make a bunch of soups for lunch and dinner. I gotta get recipes and ingredients and all that jazz.
OH. I need to get some black-eyed peas for luck.... :) I need it.
I was up till 6 a.m. this morning, and I slept till 12:30 p.m. today. Felt good, but now I have a lot of stuff to do...
I am supposed to have some pictures on display in the Berea College library for January, but I don't have the money to go and get enlargements and big frames, so I am going to be lame and just put up the 8x10s I have. I'll pick... 15 or 20 of them to put up. I feel lame about it, but I can't help I can't afford it.
Yesterday my plan was that I would go into my computer and pick out 10 pics that would work well enlarged to 13x15 (or something like that), put them on a CD, go to Meijer's, print them off there, and get frames there, but... that'll run about $100 altogether, I think. I really can't spare that 'cause of bills and whatnot. The $300-400 I have has to last me through the end of January, and really it may not even be that much.
No more driving around everywhere and stuff for this month.
I want to make a bunch of soups for lunch and dinner. I gotta get recipes and ingredients and all that jazz.
OH. I need to get some black-eyed peas for luck.... :) I need it.
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